Sometimes, you want to be kind to other people, and you (or me anyways) end up allowing them to chip away little pieces of you over time. They are small and cumulative, so you hardly notice. OR you respect or love someone so much that even though the pieces are BIG, you don’t notice the loss of yourself. Something else is distracting you: your love for them is front and center, and the loss of yourself is not. (And to be perfectly clear, when I say, “you,” I technically refer to my own lived experience. I just suspect this may be more of a universally human thing, not just me. Hence the collective “we.”)
I’ve let this happen more than once in the past. The example that most stands out to me is the ex I lived with in Austria. I had a tiny apartment I loved; he lived in a large one with a friend. Because I didn’t have housemates and he did, it was only logical that we’d spend time at my place rather than his. Gradually (but really pretty quickly), he’d bring over stuff and then leave it around. One day when he was at work, I happened to open a closet door, and I realized most of the stuff in the closet was his. Board games. Laundry. Random shit.
He had moved in with me! And I hadn’t even noticed. He may not have noticed either. I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t want to embarrass him. At the same time, I very strongly believed that before living together with someone who is something other than a platonic friend, a (or many) conversation(s) need(s) to happen. At least back then: I had lived with plenty of people, including good friends, but not with someone who fell into the social category of “partner.” I was self-aware enough to know I didn’t want to live with a “partner” at that point in my life … not because of them, but because of me. I still needed time for just myself, in my own space. I wasn’t done having a “I’m renting my own apartment” experience.
Add to that, I would not have lived with ANYONE in this particular tiny apartment on a long-term basis. I worked from home, I had two large dogs, I loved my space and my alone time, and this apartment was way too small for an additional person. Especially someone who also occasionally works from home and wanted to get a dog too. Especially someone I hadn’t dated very long, and whose life rhythms were different than mine. If this was going to be a permanent living-together conversation, I’d want at the very least to make a plan, have both of us think of what obstacles we might run into, and talk them through before deciding whether we wanted to do this or not. I felt like our unawareness that the moving in had happened robbed me of the opportunity to have that thoughtful conversation. I didn’t speak up because back then, in my early 20ies, I still didn’t question the cultural myth that we MUST let the feelings of others matter the most to the extent I do today. Remember, I grew up in a tiny European country, in a small town, and the values this country, especially its small towns, are steeped in are community-oriented. I lived in the country’s capital and largest city, but those values were still with me—even though I didn’t believe in them
Eventually, I could not bear the constant proximity in the tiny space any more. We needed to either move apart and keep dating (that’s what I would have preferred) or move to a larger space together. Or I’d break up with him; it was only a question of time until I’d explode over a small thing and he wouldn’t know what had hit him. I still don’t know if I was just very good at keeping the peace and suffering silently, or he was really bad at recognizing all the things that annoyed me. Maybe a bit of both. On top of all that, I had a therapist who very much pushed me to stay sith him. I liked the therapist. I liked her sense of humor, the strength she projected and the way she put things into perspective. I learned a whole lot from her, but in this respect, she held me back. She framed me making myself small and not speaking up when I disagreed with him as self-growth. I believed her for a long time. I wanted to self-grow. When I shared things about his constant presence I struggled with, she recognized our fundamental differences, and painted it as a most excellent learning and growth opportunity for me to (I rephrase) squeeze my own mind into acceptance.
When we were at the choice point of moving apart and continuing dating or moving to a bigger space together, I knew beyond a doubt that I wanted to do the first thing: move apart. Just undo the mistake that had happened by accident. But I loved the guy and didn’t want to hurt him. The therapist thought we should live together. I wasn’t convinced. I asked a trusted friend for advice rather than just doing what I wanted. I shared the two options I had come up with and that I strongly preferred the living-apart one because I felt like we had not had enough time just dating. I asked my friend, did they think he could take it if I explained both options and then said, I’d really like for us to just live apart again?
My friend shut me down. They said he would take it as a rejection; it would destroy my relationship; if I really felt the need to, I should bring up moving apart, but I should definitely not say that I preferred it.
I was sure he’d pick the other option if I simply presented both: living together in a bigger space. Which I felt like I could manage because I liked him a lot and did want to keep dating. But living together really was not what I wanted at this point in my life. At all. I trusted that the therapist knew better than I did, and I trusted that friend even though I disliked their advice. I presented both options objectively an let him choose.
It went the way I foresaw: he picked living together in a larger place (probably didn’t even take the other suggestion seriously), and that’s what we did.
I ended the relationship a year and a half after we had moved to the bigger place. I realized: what my friend had said back in the day? It was TERRIBLE advice. Not only was it terrible for me (never advise your friends to do something they genuinely don’t want to do! It makes you a misguided friend at best and a terrible one at worst.) It was also insulting to my partner in that it rested on the assumption that his ego wouldn’t be able to take me kindly explaining that I loved him and wanted to keep being with him, but didn’t want to live together. It robbed him of the opportunity to show me that he was an emotionally mature, self-confident adult who could handle a genuine conversation.
I don’t know what he would have done. If the relationship had ended then and there, it would have spared us 1.5 years of intermittent misery. And if it didn’t end, we probably would have broken up either way eventually, but without the need to deal with a home neither of us could afford the rent for on our own. My hard boundary would have caused us to live apart and slow way down … maybe even making room for possibilities other than breaking up. Any break-up would have been a lot less stressful because our lives would have been less entangled. We could have supported each other through it rather than getting sidetracked by how we could get rid of the place we were renting together and where we’d each go to live now (me: Thailand. He: stayed in the same place and was married to someone else 2 months later.)
It took me a few more rodeos to learn to say stop. (Single-event learning? Not me! I need to touch the stove a couple times until I believe it’s really hot.) Even now, I still get carried away … of course I do. It’sfundamentally human to get carried away by emotions sometimes if we allow ourselves to feel. I hope I’ll always be able to allow myself to feel. But when I realize I do get carried away, I will now (a decade later) stop, I will think of the kindest way I am able to communicate my own flaws of being a human who gets carried away, and I will not let things get to the point of living-together-hell. (Literally or metaphorically.) It’s about me, not about you. I appreciate you; I don’t want to live with you. It’s not about being flexible. It’s about being true to what I need. I know what I need better and better every year of my life, and it sure as hell is not living with someone I don’t want to live with. I may never want to live with anyone. Having my own space, and friends who come and hang or stay for a while now and then, is perfect for me. The bar of actually wanting to share a space with a partner (who by definition expects more than just cohabitation) is EXTREMELY high because it would have to feel net better than living by myself.
Recently, I was faced with a different kind of conundrum that brought up all this reminiscing you’ve been reading about. I’m new in a place I’m moving to. It’s a different culture. I want to live here. I’m an anarchist; I believe the idea of nation states and nuclear families is deeply flawed, and I strongly want everyone to be able to live wherever they want and however they want. At the same time, I recognize the reality we live in, and I recognize the place I ended up picking for myself happens to be inside a community that shares a certain culture. My preference would be it being in the middle of nowhere … but it’s not. I didn’t find a truly middle-of-nowhere place I could afford that had the kind of climate I like.
I’m still a guest, a newcomer, to the community. I don’t share the values of the community, but I appreciate and respect them. I don’t want to poleaxe them. The people around me have been extremely nice and helpful. That has been wonderful! I’m a helpful person too. I believe community (my definition of it is different than that of most people, but for the sake of simplicity, let’s just call it all community) is important. I’m someone you can call if your house is on fire, and I’ll run into the building to help you get your grandma out, burns to my skin or no burns. I’ll lend you my couch if you lose your home. I’ll cook you eggs if you’re out of gas. I’ll buy you food if you can’t afford it and give you money if you need some. OF COURSE. I’ll cancel other appointments and help you find your dog, your kid or your horse if they are lost; I’ll help you look all day and all night. I won’t charge you for help with your dog if you can’t afford it. All of these things are OF COURSE things to me; matter of fact; no questions asked.
I’d like my neighbors to know this because one or more of these things are bound to happen sometime, and I want them to know they can count on me. Because it DOES make a difference, and because I love this kind of human connection.
Now, there are also many things I very much am not, and that at the same time happen to be part of the community culture around here: I can’t stand smalltalk in my own space unless I’m extremely relaxed and haven’t talked to another human being in days. While I’m happy engaging in smalltalk in public as I’m waiting for my orange juice, I don’t like spending my free time drinking gaseosas, beer or tinto with my neighbors, or simply standing around and talking and joking for minutes at a time. Minutes I could use for other things, like lying under a tree in peace. I don’t appreciate people stopping and honking anytime they drive past to encourage me to come down and chat. I downright hate people coming over uninvited and without calling first. I don’t like people calling me to ask me to come have a drink with them. I don’t like getting cold calls at all, even from my friends. There’s a reason doG invented texting. It allows us to schedule calls rather than get surprised by them. In a sentence: I dislike most things my neighbors do all the time.
I’m picky when it comes to my friends. I’m not going to be your friend just because you live next to me … I’m going to be your friend because we have a connection that is meaningful to both of us, no matter where in the world you are. I’ll help you if you need me to because you live next to me. That doesn’t make us friends. I’ll also help you (if I can) if I don’t know you and I’ll never see you again. I believe we, qua humans, should all help each other out anytime we can, and I see this as completely independent from friendship or smalltalk.
Now here’s my conundrum: I’m a newcomer. Everyone wants to make smalltalk with me (and set me up with someone Colombian because dude, the societal expectation is that everyone wants a mate. That, too, isn’t true for me at this point in my life, but I’ll let that one slide for now.) What I don’t want to establish is a pattern of stopping by and talking. Especially when I’ve been busy and finally have time off, and I’m home, the LAST thing I want is to talk to a neighbor. I want to lie in the grass with my dogs and talk to no one. That’s how I recharge. That’s how I am able to show up fully and genuinely when I am needed, and that’s how I’m able to stop and help out a stranger I’ll never see again: because I recharge. And I recharge alone, or with my closest friends. I don’t recharge with my neighbors, and I certainly don’t recharge going places to have a drink, being honked at or smalltalking.
My instinct is to just explain to folks who approach me:
“I super appreciate your friendliness and welcoming-ness. It shows me that you want me here and see me as one of you! Thank you!
I also want you to know that you can count on me. If you need me—this is my number; you know where I live. Just ask; I’ll help where I can, no questions asked!
Also also, here’s a little bit about me. I recognize I’m new and you’re curious about me. I’m a loner and happy that way. Feel free to chuck it up to my background culture causing me to be weird. My dream space to live would be in the middle of nowhere, no neighbors. I strongly dislike smalltalk. I want to spend my free time by myself, with my dogs or with my closest friends. I don’t enjoy fence-talking.
That part? Not personal at all. It’s entirely about me. It’s a boundary that matters to me and that I’d like to be respected. Please let me know if there’s any boundary you’d like me to respect, too! I appreciate frank, direct conversation. Over and out.”
So this is my instinct. I trust my gut instinct for the most part: when I don’t listen to it, things tend to blow up in my face. See also: that ex in Austria. But I’m in a new country, so I ran it by a close European friend (note: not the one who had given me bad advice about my ex) and a Colombian friend who is familiar with both European and Colombian culture. Both of them were like, we totally get it, but it may be a bit much for the people living in rural Colombia. They might think you’re a jerk. Take a golden middle type approach. Be pragmatic! Meet them occasionally. Use the “different culture” or “busy” excuse at other times.
I hear it. I can logically follow the arguments. They don’t sit right with me thought. I don’t want to use excuses. I want to live in a world where people are capable of understanding individual differences (be they cultural or idiosyncratic) and go with them. I want to live in a world where I get to be a loner who absolutely will always be reliable when it matters. I don’t know if we actually do live in this world. But hearing the feedback, thinking back on past experiences of letting little pieces of what makes me me get chipped away … I’m not comfortable doing this anymore. I want to be authentically me, not hide behind excuses. If people are offended at first, so be it, but I truly believe people, unless they have a fragile ego, are able to understand that me being me is not about them.
I’m not going to squeeze myself into little boxes that are convenient or what people are used to. I find the local community lovely. And I don’t want to participate in it. These are not contradictions. I won’t disrupt local customs, and I’ll still be me, doing life my own way.
I’ll write down my thoughts, and put that piece of paper with my bullet points in my pocket, and anytime the invitation for a drink or the honking or the wanting to visit comes up … I’ll take out my list, smile and explain.
Assimilation is the chipping away of pieces I’m not willing to let go of. I won’t do it. I’m going to be respectful, kind and helpful. I’ll make my boundaries known and respected, and I will enforce them.
I won’t be like my parents who kept accepting giant chocolate Easter bunnies out of politeness, even though no one would eat them, and saying thank you so much that the next year, the chocolate Easter bunnies would be even larger and more plentiful, and now they have a house full of expired chocolate Easter bunnies. I don’t want a house full of expired chocolate Easter bunnies. Considering my friends’ opinions helped me see that.
~~~
When I started writing this post, I hadn’t yet had to explain myself to a neighbor. Now that I’m finishing it, I have. And it went well. The person—someone who had been very insistent on spending time together—understood and wasn’t insulted. We can all be adults here. We can live in a world where many worlds fit. And that’s the only world I’m interested in living in.
In other news,
since I forgot to mention these news to you last time:
My online content has a new home now! My first course, Calling All Dogs (an updated version of what used to be on FDSA) just made it on Tyler Muto’s Consider The Dog platform! It’s available as part of the membership as well as an individual purchase. One thing I like about this platform: CTD doesn’t create artificial scarcity. Everything is ALWAYS available, not creating the “need” to purchase something “right now.” Check it out! I’m still finding my way around there myself, and getting to know my fellow trainers via their huge course library. More content of mine? Coming soon!
A while ago, I shared on my Patreon that I kept going the wrong way because there were SO many corridors in the apartment building I’m staying at, and all the corridors look exactly the same. By now, I’ve figured it out, and 95% of the time, I pick the right corridor right away.
Something new has crept up though! There’s an elevator here. As I got used to taking the elevator, I stopped paying attention to the elevator buttons. (When you first take elevators in new buildings, you stop and think before you push the button: what floor do you want to go? What button do you need to push? For a couple seconds, your full attention is on the buttons, and you pick the correct one because it’s a conscious task you put effort towards.)
By now, I’ve taken the elevator so many times that I don’t shift into attention-to-the-buttons mode anymore. I just continue daydreaming or thinking about whathever it was I was thinking before I got on the elevator. I expect my finger to unthinkingly push the right button. Riding the elevator has become a habit, and I seem to unconsciously expect that so has pushing the button. Only that second part? Not true! Ever since moving the button-task to the habit-part of my brain, I push the wrong button … pretty much every second time I go up. So far, I believe I’ve gotten it right every time going down; probably because the down button is the very first one, which makes it obvious. The up button I need is in between many other up buttons. I need to push 4, but I’ve pushed 3 a lot, and just now, I pushed 2. I usually recognize the errors of my ways when the button I pushed lights up. It snaps me out of daydreaming. My mind then actually focuses on the task, I push the right button and the “close the doors” button when we reach the floor I accidentally pushed.
When riding elevators, what makes us fluent in the “right” behavior is habit: we push the correct button consciously until we do it unconsciously. I’m pretty sure for a lot of people, the transition is seamless. For me, in this building anyways, it hasn’t been. The task has shifted to the unconscious bucket before it was ready, so I keep making the “mistake” of pushing the “wrong” button about 50% of the time when I go up. That’s a lot of “mistakes!” I put the word “mistakes” in quotes because … nothing bad happens. I lose 2 seconds of time or so, but that’s it. It’s not a “punishing” consequence; it’s a consequence I don’t mind. So the consequence of the doors opening on the wrong floor first isn’t likely to teach me anything.
I think if someone put a sticky note on “my” (the “right”) button for going upwards, or lit this button before I pushed it, my success rate would be close to 100%. Even without thinking about it. Because just like going down, it would be obvious. And if the button stayed obvious for another … I don’t know, 50 reps, which equals 16.666 days, they could then remove the sticky note or the light and I’d probably be able to unconsciously select the “right” button due to the habit having had more time to form without me making “mistakes.”
Do I care about getting it right the first time? No. It doesn’t matter to me. So I’m good; I don’t need anyone to help me out with sticky notes. I just find it interesting to think about. I suspect that even without the sticky notes, if I kept riding this elevator for a few more months, I would end up getting it right—unconsciously—every single time. I won’t be able to confirm this because I won’t stay here long enough, but I believe that learning is going to happen; it’ll just take more time because I’m free to make mistakes, and the only consequence is a lack of reward (getting to the right floor is a low-value reward most times; the doors opening on the wrong floor slows me down and I don’t care; it is simply the absence of a reward.) Habit will develop, but it will take longer than if the “correct” button stood out to me more.
This is of course a dog training metaphor. And I fully believe that other learners would not need a post-it note or a lit-up button to learn faster. Other learners may already have learned what I didn’t learn. Other learners yet may perceive the doors opening on the wrong floor more saliently than I do, and also learn faster. Different beings have different learning styles, and different experiences matter to different beings.
For a learner like me, what would be the fastest (which isn’t automatically the “best”; it depends on the task at hand what is best!) way of teaching/learnign to push the “right” button going up? Note that when it comes to me riding elevators, learning speed doesn’t matter at all, making this purely a thought experiment. I believe for the learner I am, if you wanted to maximize the learning speed in the elevator scenario, you’d have to implement a consequence I’d prefer to avoid every time I pushed the “wrong” up button. The consequence would have to be delivered either immediately, or someone needed to mark it.
Remember I need to push “4” to get it right. So if I pushed “3,” there should either be a beep (a “punishment marker”) and then, when I got to floor 3 and the doors opened, the consequence would be implemented (say, that floor was filled with several inches of water and it flooded the elevator the moment the doors opened, so my shoes and socks would get wet. Or floor #3 was on fire, so when the doors opened, I’d have to work to keep my dogs’ noses away from the open doors so they didn’t get singed, and I’d feel an uncomfortable heat wave pushing into the elevator. Or there’d have to be very loud, very terrible music playing on floor #3, causing me to cover my ears the moment the doors opened there.)
An immediate consequence (not requiring a marker) could be: all the wrong buttons could have sticky stuff on them, and if I touched them, my fingers would then also be sticky and stay that way until I reached a faucet. I’d dislike that quite a bit. It could be tooth paste, jam, peanut butter, paint that hasn’t yet dried … I’d dislike it the most if I didn’t know what the sticky stuff was and thought it might be vomit or snot, but I think something less disgusting, like toothpaste, would do the job just fine. Vomit or snot would be accessively intense, and (I suspect) not speed up my learning process.
Or anytime I pushed the button, there could be a kind of noise that sent shivers down my spine, for example the sound of chalk screeching on a blackboard.
Or anytime I pushed the button, the button itself could spray water in my face, or release the odor of cheap perfume, which is something I can’t stand.
This experience would probably be punishing, and I suspect what would happen to me is, I would move the riding-up-the-elevator task out of the bucket of “habit” and back into the bucket of “pay attention when you do this!” It would stay there longer, allowing me to actually create a functional habit, and by the time I moved it back to the habit container, I WOULD be able to unconsciously get it right even when I was daydreaming.
When it comes to the elevator, I’m happy learning just over time. I really don’t care. So there’s zero reason for an aversive consequence, however well implemented, that would speed up the learning process. The stakes aren’t just low, there are no stakes. I wouldn’t mind pushing the wrong button for another month. That’s why I said, whether learning speed matters depends on the task.
I can also imagine that some learners would not learn at all, not even in 2 months, if nothing happened when they pushed the wrong button. That’s why teaching style needs to take into account who your learner is. If the task has zero stakes and the learner doesn’t progress, does it matter? Maybe not! That’s up to you, the teacher.
For other tasks, like crossing a busy highway, learning speed absolutely matters. I wouldn’t want my mind to shift this task into the “don’t pay attention” bucket before I was sure I had installed a strong habit of checking whether I was about to get run over by a car or not. The faster I learned this, the safer I would be. So in this scenario, if I was a slow learner who shifts tasks to the “whatever” category too fast, it would arguably be in my best interest to implement an undesired consequence for stepping off the sidewalk without checking what’s going on first.
Why do I bore you with my elevator ruminations this morning? I’m stuck at home with a nasty cold. And I think it’s relevant for dog training. I’d love anyone’s thoughts! Do you agree with me? How we teach should be about who the learner is and what the task is? If not … what should it be about? I want to hear your perspective! Also, of course, it’s not either habit or consequence. Most things (like crossing streets and riding elevators) become habits eventually either way.
Before I let you go, let me give you a couple news since I haven’t shared a blog post in a while and A LOT has happened since the last one!
Patreon
If you liked this text and want to see more like it, as well as other thoughts and videos about balanced dog and human “training,” as well as thoughts about different cultures, adapting to them, and being downwardly mobile … join one of my paid Patreon tiers. The reason they exist is that I need your support … and by now, there’s a big backlog of (mostly) videos to go through!
Free-roaming dogs journey!
I’m planning a small trip to observe and discuss the free-roaming dogs of Colombia next year. I’ll take between 4 and 6 people, and since this is the very first time I’m going to organize something like this, I will keep it as budget-y as possible! Send me an e-mail if you’re interested, and I’ll invite you to our first video meeting where you get to chime in about content, planning and even when we go!
We started the morning with a session of lots of street-crossing practice in my neighborhood.
Then, we went to the dog park1 for the last time of Doggie’s stay with me. His confidence has continuously grown from one day to the next, and today, he started playing! All the dogs in the compilation below are unfamiliar to him. I think it’s safe to say that when Doggie gets greater freedom at home now, he’ll be chill around new dogs (who he hasn’t had access to while being mostly confined due to his suicidal street-crossing maneuvers.)
A relaxed car dog
After practicing sidewalk behaviors and socializing all morning, we headed back to Naucalpan around noon. Doggie slept through the car ride – an hour is just the right time for a juvenile Mal to recharge!
The handover session
I spent the afternoon with Doggie’s humans for a thorough handover session. It was great to see how happy and excited Doggie was to see his favorite people again, and how excited and newly motivated they were to keep working with him! Eduardo had already shared my videos and explained things in theory to his sister and dad. When I got there, everyone was already on the same page.
First I showed them what Doggie and I had practiced in person, and then they took turns working on all the different steps. With a little help, Doggie did great for everyone – both stopping at curbs until released with “¡Libre!, listening to his leave it/stop itcue (¡Alto!) and his sit cue, fetching toys in the field next to the sidewalk without stepping on the street and tugging on a toy instead of the leash.
We ended with a few theory tips about how to help Doggie relax around Eduardo’s young nieces and nephews.
Speaking of nieces and nephews: there is only thing I regret not having done while Doggie stayed with me. When the neighborhood kids asked to pet my dogs when I was out with Chai and Doggie, I said no. I’m used to saying no because Chai is not a fan of being touched by strangers. I missed out on this opportunity for Doggie to refresh his puppy memory of interacting with children. He’d have benefitted from it, especially now that I’ve heard that unlike his dad Drago, Doggie hasn’t been allowed around Eduardo’s nieces and nephews so far. That said, I hope that with a plan in place, he’ll get to be around them in the future either way!
Trueques
My new windshield wipers aren’t here yet – but soon! I love when we’re all helping each other through exchanges of knowledge or things rather than money. It feels more personal and fun. Eduardo’s family knows they’ll always have a dog trainer in their corner, and I know I’ll always have someone who knows about cars! When they need someone to look after one of their dogs, I’ll be here for them – and when I need someone for Game, she’ll be welcome with her bonus family there. It takes a village!
The weeks ahead
Doggie is still a juvenile baby raptor, full of energy and the need to go-go-go. Eduardo and his family will continue implementing the training I started and up his exercise and play routine a bit. We’ll reassess in a few weeks. If necessary, Doggie will spend another week with me in the end of September where I can make him my priority before being tied up with FDSA from October 1st, or I’ll come back for another session or two (it’s unfortunately a bit of a drive.) The hope is, of course, that Eduardo and his family will be able to work with him themselve going forwards, with only minor hickups! But with juvenile Mals being juvenile Mals, you never know.
The benefits and risks of living life off leash
I’ve talked about this on several occasions in the past, but this is a good opportunity to share my own point of view again.
Doggie’s best life, the one we all want for him, is one that is like his dad Drago’s: being able to roam freely. Drago was able to do this from the day he came home to Eduardo. Doggie, as a small puppy, fearlessly wanted to play-jump on strangers and cross roads. This led his humans to restrain him more than their other dogs in order to keep him and everyone around him safe, and that, in turn, caused Doggie to be difficult to live with because he had lots of energy and not enough places to put it.
It is of course risky to allow dogs off-leash freedom around cars. None of us are kidding ourselves about this. It is also a question of life quality. Not everyone has yards, cars, time to drive to dog training facilities and hiking trails, or dog parks within walking distance. They aren’t the only ways of giving powerful, high-energy dogs their best lives. I’d venture that being around one or more family members all day long, getting to hang out while they are attending customers, playing on the field with neighborhood dog friends or the dog’s humans and toys whenever nothing else is going on, and going on long off leash walks or learning new tricks as soon as Eduardo gets home from work at night make for a damn near perfect life of freedom, exercise, enrichment and dog/dog as well as dog/human social interactions! Our hope is that Doggie is a few steps closer to having this life now too.
I’ll update you on “what happend next” with Doggie and the other rebelde puppies as soon as I get around to it … The backlog of what I want to share is large – but slowly, step by step, I’m making my way through it! I want to continue transparently sharing the ups and downs of their lives with you all!
If you’re in the Global North and part of a particular slice of the dog world, you may be apalled by the fact that Doggie is going to a dog park to socialize. The local dog culture here is different, and so is the dog park culture. The way I live and work with dogs changes depending on where in the world I am. ↩︎
This morning, a friend followed us around the neighborhood and took videos of our work for Eduardo, Doggie’s human. We practiced and recorded all the skills Doggie had practiced. Below are two of them, showing things I haven’t shown in my previous posts.
Stop and sit at the curb
The first video is the goal behavior for our city puppy: Eduardo’s greatest challenge has been the fact that Doggie isn’t afraid of cars and hasn’t learned to stay on the sidewalk. He could be roaming freely if only he learned to respect sidewalk boundaries. Doggie’s other high-energy challenges come from the fact that Eduardo’s family doesn’t have a yard, and that unlike their other Mals, Doggie is the kind of dog who will run back and forth across busy streets – and they live in a busy car neighborhood. To keep him safe, he has been confined or on leash – and that has made it hard for Doggie to keep his teeth and paws to himself whenever his humans have time for him!
The goal behavior is for Doggie to stop at the curb even if the human gets going and even if food is dropped (not on video, but we’ve worked up to this successfully), and sit before being released. I still use a sit cue (¡Siéntate!) in this video, but as Eduardo and his dad and sister keep working on this, it will eventually become an offered sit. The sit is a safety behavior in addition to stopping: once it is well-rehersed, if one behavior breaks down, it will be the first one – sitting – rather than the second one – staying on the curb. A dog who stands on the sidewalk rather than sits is better than a dog who jumps in front of a car!
I’ve only worked on this behavior for a week. While we’ve generalized to many sidewalks, Eduardo and his family will need to continue working on it to really turn it into a habit. In the video below, I show how to help Doggie if he steps off the sidewalk before his release cue (¡Libre!)
We also went into the dog park again (no video), where Doggie’s confidence around new dogs had grown even more than on day #5, and my friend took a few pictures of Doggie and me – I want memories of Doggie’s time with me! This one is my favorite:
After a longer outing, we headed back home where Doggie practiced staying home alone with the girls while I went back out for a lesson with the young gentleman below:
The manual for being a juvenile Mal
Doggie was being a good, relaxed boy for the rest of the day … until I had a video consult! As the manual for being a juvenile Malinois requires, he woke up just in time to unplug my Internet not just once, but twice. Unfortunately for Don Doggie, he got tethered before he had a chance to kick my clients off the call a third time.
We ended the day – our last day together! – rolling around the couch in an attempt to get all four of us in a picture … with varying levels of success!
Juvenile Mals are a lot of dog first thing in the morning! As of today, we’ve found a place for Doggie to put his early-morning arousal: as soon as his day starts, he gets his tried and true fleece tug pacifier to hold on to. I keep the other end of it in my hand so he can’t loose it.
Chai’s on a retractable leash first thing in the morning, and Doggie would like to chew her leash – but if there’s his fleece tug, he’ll choose that instead, no questions asked. It’s got to feel a lot more fun to bite down on! So this morning, our first loop consisted of Doggie tugging/holding on to the toy almost nonstop – it feels like holding a kid’s hand as we walk – while Chai does her own morning things on the retractable leash. Then I went back and switched adult dogs. Game is always off leash in the morning, and by the time we got to her loop, Doggie had down-regulated enough for me to leave the tug in the apartment without getting jumped on, humped or my feet chewed.
Doggie explored and sniffed alongside Game, sat for treats, checked in for praise a lot and did his morning peeing and pooping. Superstar! All of this off leash for him – only Chai is currently leashed in the morning (until we’ve got our cat chasing sufficiently under recall control – we’re almost there!)
Thoughts on Mals and Border Collies
It’s been a lot of fun to remember how intensely worky juvenile Mals are! Chai, the last dog I had at this age, has been super chill in comparison. Part of it may have been that she constantly had diarrhea at that time and may have felt physically weaker. A lot was still new for her at 5.5 months, so she may have had less muscle and satiated on stimulation more easily because of it – who knows! Hadley, the Border Collie I raised for an ex, was certainly higher maintenance at this age than Chai, but no comparison to any of my Mals or even to Phoebe.
The Malinois I’ve raised are different from the Border Collies I’ve raised (I haven’t raised a lot by any means, so these observations really only apply to my own dogs and a few puppies of friends I know well.)
When Game and Grit were puppies, I had a yard and a 2-person, 5-dog household (for Game’s first 6 months and Grit’s first 1.5 years.) Game took a colleague’s weekly puppy socialization class, we trained all the foundations at home, and anytime she wasn’t sleeping or working with me, she’d find herself a playmate in one of our other dogs.
When I went to Thailand after, we didn’t have a yard, but the dogs certainly got a lot of physical and mental stimulation: weekends running at the beach, and during the week, I slowly worked Game up to twice daily treadmill runs of 30 minutes each (Game did an hour in one go), we went on short neighborhood walks every morning and evening and occasionally Game worked at chilling under the table when I went to a corner food place for lunch. We also spent time at the Siam Crown training fields and yards most days where the dogs got to run free on a giant property and we trained a little. I worked on tricks around the agility equipment with Game and we did bitework foundations, and we played and trained (and the dogs swam) around/in Siam Crown’s saltwater dog pool. Sometimes in addition and sometimes instead of Siam Crown, we went to walk banana plantations and swim in irrigation canals, watch huge monitor lizards and look for Thailand’s beautiful snakes, or walked around some of the temples of Sam Phran and interacted with free-roaming dogs. Grit and Game played a lot with each other, and Game also had a Mal friend who was her age and a Boston Terrier friend.
At home, Game also worked on nosework almost every day.
Every single calory she didn’t earn in training came from a Kong, Squirrel Dude (basically a more difficult Kong) or was a frozen raw meat bone – chews to keep her busy.
When we moved to Guatemala, we had a yard again. Game’s physical activities included lots and lots of mountainbiking and uphill bikejoring, long daily hikes and running with my car because I lived on an almost traffic-free dirt road. The training activity of our choice at this point was sniffing out fake cadaver scent in huge outdoor areas. She also went almost everywhere with me, from visiting friends to getting my hair cut and eating out to being my demo dog when I worked with in-person clients.
Up until last year, whenever I didn’t have a yard, I spent around 3 hours outdoors with Game every day (in addition to a little bit of training or informal play) unless we did A LOT of intense brain training.
When Chai joined us, Game and I started doing a bit less – it was made up for by lots of play between the two, especially when Chai was a puppy and juvenile dog. Then Game was busy with her puppies who sure took lots of energy. I’ve built her stamina back up after. She continues not needing quite as much exercise anymore and being a chill and content dog in the house, but she also has a treadmill again for days I’m sick or can’t take her out as much as we’d like to for another reason.
None of the Border Collies were as physically strong and intense as the Mals when they didn’t get their cognitive and physical needs met. Hadley sure had issues as a puppy, but they expressed themselves in less destructive ways. Mals get “angry” or destructive. Border Collies get depressed or neurotic.
There sure are similarities (two working breeds who generally like cooperating with humans), but they are SO different too. It’s hard to put my finger on the key difference. Being serious, as a personality trait, seems stronger in Mals – including in goofy ones like Game. Game is un-serious for a Mal. There is still more of a “this is serious business and I am working on this” vibe to working with any Mal I’ve ever met, while my Border Collies and most other Borders I know well have had a more playful vibe. They too could train all day long, but they seemed more light-hearted.
Mick may be an exception; he was always serious, and his single interest in life was sheep. Or maybe Mick was the rule and Hadley and Chai are exceptions. Who knows! Maybe there is no rule. I like that thought best!
Urban adventuring with Doggie and Chai
For our training walk, I took Chai and Doggie to our usual park. Doggie needed 2 or 3 reminders at the curb – it’s still a new behavior, AND I just added Chai to the mix, and also ducking out of sight behind parkeded cars to reminding him to keep an eye on me – but he did SO well that I had him off leash for the entire walk today! He’s doing fantastic and learning fast!
Dog park adventure
I took Doggie and Chai into the dog park again. Doggie reciprocated dogs greeting him and showed interest in a 4 months old Border Collie puppy (who was so much smaller than him! It’s wild!) Either the fact that we came back to a familiar space, as opposed to it being new yesterday, or the fact that Chai was around as well (or both) helped him approach other dogs. There were more dogs here today than yesterday, and Doggie ventured further from me and even stole a ball, and showed real interest in the Border puppy.
There was, however, also a situation in the dog park that was a bit much for Doggie: people wanting to interact with him while there were also All The Dogs around (see the video below.) I let him find out that he was safe for himself.
Depending on the dog, I’d handle situations like this differently. For example, I would not have put the much more sensitive Chai into this kind of situation – to this day, I’m very adamant about her not having to deal with strangers reaching for her. Doggie’s confidence, even when he’s insecure, is far greater and he doesn’t spiral up in greeting scenarios – so I let him find out what it’s like to walk up to and be greeted by people and dogs for himself. You can see in his body language in the video below that these aren’t stress-free interactions, but ones he is perfectly able to handle nevertheless. He is also free to leave and does so (I didn’t catch the second time on video.)
In a different situation today, Doggie checked in with me on two occasions when a dog barked at him. This, I’d venture, is a tentativeness-based response. I reinforced the check-ins and will facilitate some more meet-the-dogs outings in the next few days. I can see how he’s coming out of his shell at the dog park. If he lived here with me permanently, I’d take him there every day for a month or so and expect him to then be back to his puppy self around dogs, simply by meeting lots of different ones off leash every day.
Everything we did not chase today
No bike chasing, kids chasing, trying to play with the broom of someone weeping the sidewalk or chasing of passing dogs or even Chai when she was crittering … I’m very proud! The only one who got briefly chased a bit exuberantly was the Border Collie puppy when we met them again outside the dog park, and Big Doggie was like, “Hey, I KNOW you!” and ran towards the puppie who took flight. I was able to call him off with his “pup-pup-pup” recall. Its strength keeps impressing me.
Doggie earned A LOT of food out and about AND found a large junk of chicken for dessert. A successful outing! Chai, for her part, only found bones. But then again, she came across an entire bolillo last night. It’s not as if the streets had been stingy with her either.
Arousal behaviors and calming down
Barking and drinking
Doggie likes to talk: barking is part of his attempts to get Chai to play, and before we established “sit to ask for stuff,” he vocalized while shoe-biting me too. Game also used to like to vocalize when she had opinions at his age.
Doggie is also an arousal drinker: when highly excited, he’ll drink a lot. Adolescent Chai used to be that way too. I am seeing Doggie’s arousal drinking go down already as he settles in with us more and more every day.
Clarity
I can’t ask him, but get the impression that clarity and structure also make a big difference in terms of Doggie’s arousal. (Part of this may be my confirmation bias, of course: I get the impression that worky dogs in general do best with clarity, which makes me likely to attribute positive behavior changes to increased clarity.)
Down-regulating
Doggie’s down-regulating after coming home from today’s outing to the park was fantastic too. He only followed me around the apartment for two or three minutes, curious what I was up to. Then he laid down to rest. Briefly after, he got a second wind and tried to get Chai to play – but before long, he peacefully passed out on the couch.
Closed doors
As of yesterday, Doggie is able to stay behind closed doors, for example when I go to the bathroom, without scratching them. Goodest boy!
Late afternoon outing: kids and adults, bikes and bread, running and yelling …
There was A LOT going on around the apartment towers tonight; from someone selling bread out of their car and announcing it loudly to someone selling random little snacks at pop-up tables to what felt like all the kids running around and yelling or riding bikes all at one, and all the adults taking strolls between the buildings. I don’t think I’ve seen things here THIS busy before (I’ve only lived in this neighborhood for a few months and am still learning about it.) We walked a little, then I picked Doggie up and carried him past the main commotion because I didn’t want to risk him running after a kid. I had forgotten the fleece tug, and I didn’t want him to practice chewing on his leash or pulling either. Conveniently, he’s still easy to pick up and carry, and just like we practiced when the puppies were tiny, he’ll go limp in my arms and relax.
We went to the part of our space that has all the wild, giant large-leaved plants and tall grass and bushes. Everything was still wet from the rain, and Doggie got the best kind of zoomies (while mom Game found THREE avocados that had fallen off a tree and ate them all. Lucky girl!) Doggie had a great time zooming, and in between bouncy, high-speed loops, he’d come back and sit to ask for a treat.
Two dogs in two different windows saw Doggie running laps and barked at him. His response to this was to come and check in with me. He’s a little tentative when dogs are yelling at him.
On the way back to my place, he gave one bark towards a suddenly appearing person who was moving away from us and took off towards them, full-on “I’m a big and powerful Mal, look at what I can do!”, tail high and confident and arousal-hackles up. I called him; he turned on a dime to come and eat his scatter.
This was interesting to observe! Either Doggie was wound up from his zoomies OR he is getting used to this environment and starting to regard it as “his,” so if someone we haven’t invited comes into our zoomie space, we tell them who’s boss. The bark-run towards the person looked like an adult Malinois response, not like a fear-based or conflicted behavior to me. From what I’ve seen (he’s a big, friendly boy,) if I let him run up to a person in this state of arousal, he’d probably end up jumping and asking for attention once he got there rather than continuing to bark – but I don’t know since, of course, I called him back instead of letting him scare the person.
As we were almost back home, four kids playing some game came running and yelling towards us from four directions at the same time. I put Game on Doggie’s leash and picked up Doggie. On the way out, a little kid on a bike fell right in front of us (we were being good and eating a scatter rather than going to investigate), but running kids at this age, this speed, this number and this noise level … not exactly a scenario I want to add two Malinois to! Doggie gave one soft bark as the kids kept coming super close and running right around us, yelling. I held on to Game’s collar and we waited until the craze had moved on. Both dogs continued their walk back home without giving the kids a second thought.
I wonder what it’s like to grow up here. I suspect it is fun: this apartment complex has to have 6000 or more inhabitants (which is more than the entire town I grew up in.) The reason I know it’s at least 6000 is that it is part of some city neighborhood-something initative, and only housing projects of 6000 or more people get to be a part of this initiative. The supposedly biggest housing project in the city has (numbers vary) between 8 and 9000 inhabitants, which is twice as many as the town I grew up in. It’s wild to think how many people fit into such a small area if you just make your buildings taller instead of urban-sprawling all over the place!
Turn taking
Doggie did great staying on his suitcase when I worked with Chai in the same room today. He’s really coming along nicely! I’m happy with his day.
We walked from my apartment area to the park in the next neighborhood over on leash. Doggie had an easy time dismissing dogs we met on walks. No problem passing them up close on the sidewalk. We practiced sitting and waiting to be released with “Libre” at the curb before crossing any and all streets we encountered, choosing a different route than the previous days: I want to mix it up to help him generalize. He’s getting better and better!
Choosing the pacifier tug over leash biting
During bouts of juvenile-dog-ness, by now, Doggie reliably chooses the fleece tug (when I have it on me) when his arousal gets high! Rather than jumping at me or biting my clothes/shoes, he simply holds on to his pacifier. Since this is actually more fun for him, he looks happy and calms down quickly – as opposed to occasionally looking desperate before I introduced the pacifier. I love how fast he learned to choose the fleece tug over leashes, human limbs and clothes!
Walking home off leash
Today is the longest I’ve had Doggie off leash in an urban environment: after our park adventures I’ll talk about below, we walked all the way home off leash. Doggie rocked it! I’m proud of him!
At the park: curiosity and neutrality towards unfamiliar dogs, handler focus, the tug pacifier and redirectability
Like aunt Chai, Doggie discovered how much fun it is to play in the fountains!
Today – a day WAY less busy than when we first came to this same park on the weekend – I had a few opportunities to record! The video below shows Doggie’s curiosity (first clip) as well as neutrality around other dogs, his handler focus (he chooses to happily play and walk with me rather than explore) and how easy it is to redirect him (last clip.)
If you’re located in the Global North, let me clarify something before you watch. The dog culture is different here. At this park (it’s in a somewhat, but not yet extremely gentrified area), there’s a 50/50 split of on and off leash dogs. Unless an on-leash dog’s human shows that they don’t want to be approached, on-leash greetings are welcomed by humans and dogs.
I know the Schnauzer in the first clip (but Doggie does not.) The reason I added this clip to the video is not to upset anyone, but to share Doggie’s curiosity – and, most of all, the “arousal-happy hackles” I mentioned in my post about day #1!
A fun detail to observe: “arousal-happy hackles” in puppies and juvenile dogs with a certain coat structure
You can see them well in the clip above, where Doggie interacts with the Schnauzer (watch his neck), and you can also see the loose body language. In the second clip, there’s still a bit of “arousal-happy hackles” from exploring the world.
Hackles up doesn’t necessarily mean a dog is grumpy. We need to read it as part of their overall body language. Think of it as a word in a sentence or a sentence in a paragraph: in and of itself, hackles in breeds with a certain coat structure (Malinois among them) mean arousal – no more and no less. The same goes for wagging tails (in all dogs): by themselves, they only mean arousal. They do not necessarily mean the dog is happy or friendly.
Unfamiliar humans at the park
As for humans, it’s been easy to redirect my off-leash guest at the park. He’s interested though and it doesn’t take much encouragement from a stranger, and he’ll approach. Running children are also tempting (but easy to redirect from.) I suspect if I didn’t redirect, he’d play-run and jump on kids. At 5.5 months, he is confident and playful with humans.
In the dog park
I also took Doggie into a dog park for the first time today. Below is a snippet of this part of our field trip:
This video is interesting. One, ideally, I would have hidden my treats and the toy to be less of a magnet for Doggie. He offers a lot of sits for me to get a treat (and since we are only just learning this behavior, I keep up my continuous reinforcement schedule.)
Doggie ignores the other dogs in the park in order to ask me for food instead. While this is lovely, it also shows that Doggie hasn’t been around non-household dogs: since he hasn’t been off leash outside and likes tugging on the leash, he has rarely been out and about with his humans. So it’s been a while that he had the opportunity to interact with unfamiliar dogs.
I’m reading my dog park observations the following way: Doggie is comfortable around dogs (I started recording right after going in, and the Basset Hounds came up right away to try and mug me for treats – no problem for Doggie.) At the same time, he doesn’t quite know what to do (how to play) with the unfamiliar dogs because he hasn’t had a chance to practice dog/dog play over the last few months. A dog his age and of his breed, with his level of energy, who isn’t afraid of other dogs should technically try to play, play and play even more (like he tries to convince Game and Chai to do.)
Watching him here, I decided to keep bringing him back into the dog park every day he’s with me to provide an opportunity to loosen up and start playing with the others. I might have to hide the food and tug the next time!
In any case, I’m really happy how chill he is around dog park dogs! My extreme-early-socialization bias wants to attribute this to the fact that he met between 50 and 60 different dogs in his first 8 weeks of life with me. If he hadn’t had this many interactions early on, I’d expect to see a fearful dog. Mind you, this is just me going off what I’ve seen in dogs this age who have not had a chance to interact with many other dogs since they moved to their humans at 8 weeks or so, and who have not experienced extreme early socialization.
In Doggie’s case, I see (I want to see!) a juvenile dog whose early puppyhood experiences have immunized him against fear of dogs. He hasn’t honed his dog/dog play skills with new dogs in months and therefore switches to known behaviors instead: sit to ask me for treats.
Thoughts on dog parks
We dog trainers will often tell folks to keep their dogs out of dog parks.
In reality, there is no one-size-fits-all solution: some dogs do great in dog parks. Others do not. Depending what part of the world a dog park is located in and what that dog park looks like, we can also either expect it to be filled with well socialized dogs … or with poorly socialized ones.
I don’t tell my international clients to take their young dogs into dog parks. I also don’t hesitate to take this puppy who I have raised with extreme early socialization into a Mexican dog park for continued juvenile socialization. Doggie is going to benefit. If he was a different dog or we were in a different part of the world, my decisions might look completely different. They’d also look different if I was a different person. There is no one right way, but there usually is what’s right for you and your dog right now – tomorrow may be different.
Free-roaming dogs around my apartment complex
I live in a neighborhood that’s not (yet) gentrified (not the same one as the one with the park I showed you), which means we get free-roaming dogs here.1 Today, I recorded Doggie’s encounter with two of them. If I remember correctly, he has seen both these dogs once before (but I don’t have it on video.) It’s lovely to see how quickly he dismisses the white dog and shows interest in sniffing/scavenging instead! No hyper-greeter feelings, no fear. Just doing his thing and co-existing. He’s a lovely boy!
Thunder? So what!
In other news, it’s been thundering and raining at least once a day since Doggie got here, and he has either not stopped whatever he was doing or slept right through it. SO happy that he’s doing so well! Even when a transformer fuse exploded today, he didn’t miss a beat! Yay! I’m aware that noise sensitivity can develop later in life, as it did in Game – but so far, so good!
Latin American dog culture differs widely, largely depending on two factors: (1) the socioeconomic bracket of a neighborhood and (2) whether it’s a rural or an urban area. ↩︎
This morning started out with lots of wonderful bounciness and a little bit of imitating Game:
On our walk back, outside my building, I saw Doggie bark at a stranger (human, not dog) for the first time. Last night, even in the twiligt of our last outing of the day, he was being a superstar. The person this morning had a toddler strapped to their chest, with the toddler’s legs dangling and moving by their side. If you only saw the silhouette, they would have looked like a person with 4 arms, I imagine. I called Doggie (“pup-pup-pup” is incredibly strong and snappy), and he immediately turned to race back to me rather than continuing to approach the person. He loved the party I threw for him and didn’t look back at the person with the toddler. We also saw not just one, but two barky dogs around the apartment complex this morning – one Chihuahua sized dog on a leash on the other side of the basketball court fence we were playing in, who came up to the fence, and later a slightly-smaller-than-medium white curly dog who was out by themselves, wandering around the parking lot, saw us and started barking. Both times, Doggie just looked and dismissed. I’m very happy with this response – especially given that it happened soon after we got reunited in the morning and I suspect arousal levels may still have been above average!
As for the Chihuahua-sized dog behind the fence, Doggie’s look went hand in hand with a brief hackles-up, and the immediate dismiss went with hackles-down. This is the hackles-up of arousal we see in many young (and some adult) dogs, especially shepherdy ones and other dogs with this type of coat: they’ll often have “trigger-happy hackles.” Sudden/unexpected spikes in arousal express themselves in this way a lot. This is something to read in context. If the context is surprise and the dog comes right back down to baseline or combines it with curiously approaching and loose body language, this is neither what we commonly label as “fear” or “aggression” – it is just the way internal arousal manifests itself. Arousal is neutral – neither “good” nor “bad.”
I’ll try and get a video of arousal-happy hackles sometime; I imagine folks with dogs whose coat is longer or tends to lie flat against the dog’s bodies, is curly or cover them fluffily are not aware of this, and it’s a good thing to know! (You wouldn’t see this in Goldens, rough-coated BCs, Shelties, Cockers or Poodles, for example.)
Handler focus and picking up behaviors
I’ve been throwing a lot of new stuff at Doggie, and am impressed how quickly he’s been picking things up. His handler focus is still strong, and he clearly appreciates genuine praise/pets and feedback (more so than the average dog.) If he checks in or comes back, just praising and petting will make his eyes shine. That’s a lovely quality. He may outgrow it … but it’s cool, however long it will last!
Toy play for Chai and Doggie
During Chai’s outing, we played in the basketball cage today until she was so tired she lay down in a puddle of rain water with her toy. While simultaneously playing with Chai, I taught Doggie a simple game of fetch and used it to strengthen his “libre” release in new circumstances: “sientate” to ask him to sit, “libre” and then toss his ball. I love seeing his understanding grow! Look at this boy sitting to ask for his toy rather than throwing himself at me!
In the video above, I wait for Doggie to voluntarily drop his ball or trade for kibble (“Drop” announces me dropping a handful of kibble, which then allows me to pick up the toy.)
I’m adding behaviors and cues to his game faster than I would otherwise because I don’t have as much time with Doggie as I would with my own dogs, and it could make a big difference in his future life quality. We’re now peacefully asleep after getting to both move and think. Good puppy!
Doggie’s solo training session
Doggie and I went to get some video and practice waiting at the curb. The behavior organically developed into stop at the curb and sit until released. We first practiced on leash, then with the leash dragging and then off leash.1
We’ll work on this every day at every curb on every walk until he goes back to Naucalpan.
We’ve also established that there’s no need for Doggie to walk in a halter. He can be off leash or on any collar; he just needs a fleece tug to carry or tug on anytime he feels the need to, and he won’t pull or bite shoes:
The video above is from September 5 when I had a friend following me and videoing for Doggie’s humans – but we started practicing on September 2. My hope is that this simple trick will allow them to feel less frustrated taking him out, and he’ll end up getting to go on more field trips – on or off leash.
If your pup or juvenile dog is a landsharky breed with boundless energy, try simply carrying something they can hold on to or dig their teeth into anytime they need an arousal release. If the material is fun to bite, dogs who express arousal with their mouths tend to quickly learn to use that biteable pacifier (rather than their leash or your body) whenever they need to!
Nail trims
I don’t know if and how often Doggie has gotten his nails done since he left, but I was curious to see if I could still handle his paws and clip the nails. I could – no problem at all except for when he wanted to play with the nail clippers instead. I LOVE that he continues being good with this procedure that we practiced soooo much!
Nail trims are one of these things some dogs need months and months to learn and tolerate. I’m SO glad I taught Game’s puppies nail trims are normal so their humans will be able to focus on fun stuff instead!
I know that Judge (Oso; purple collar boy) is having an easy time with the Dremel as well. I don’t know about the other three puppies, but will find out when I get a chance!
The reason I can progress this behavior so fast is that I’m using R- in addition to R+. I don’t want to go into details in this post (I’m not interested in participating in the dog culture wars with this post), but I find it important to acknowledge this here. There is no way Doggie would be able to learn about the sidewalk boundary this fast without the R- component. ↩︎
Doggie was a bit of a desperate maniac when I finally released him from his prison this morning. I opened the door to the outside world for him to see what would happen (I need coffee before or while taking out the dogs these days; my brain won’t brain otherwise.) The open door is something he’ll need to learn for his humans, who worry he’ll take off. It’s safe here since we live on a plot that’s part of a high rise housing thing with a giant shared “yard” in the end of a dead-end street. His humans live right on a car street, which makes the same thing a lot more dangerous.
Our start into the day: getting to lo leave and choosing to stay; meeting a stranger and a new dog and imitating Chai’s toy games
Doggie did great: took himself out to potty, stayed close and came right back in. He sniff-explored within sight of the door and kept coming back in to check on me until I had transferred the coffee into my thermos mug (thank you, Chris) and was ready to head out.
I let Doggie observe Chai’s morning play session, and he picked up on it and started running along with her and showing signs of trying to imitate our game! Smart boy!
He also curiously approached1 the person who feeds the pigeons around here every morning. The birds flew off and the person waved the feed-bag (a big black trash bag) in his face and told him to get lost, and he calmly deferred and came back to me. Lovely job there, Doggie! I’m focusing a lot on observing at this point to find my best training angles.
We also met our first free-roamer this morning. The dog came over to greet us because they didn’t know Doggie yet (they know Chai and Game), and he was completely neutral towards them, just like he’s been with the various strange humans we’ve seen. I’m very happy with this – so far, the only thing I’d like to be different is that I wish I had gotten more sleep. I’m glad our first two days are a weekend where I have less non-Doggie things on my plate!
Time to train!
All three pups have settled down as I’m typing out my morning notes2, so Mr. Doggie is going to get a training session next! If possible, I use sessions to reinforce being chill (rather than reinforce bouncing-off-the-walls with training.) I’ll use half his breakfast and then the other half for the outing I’ve planned for later this morning. The preliminary plan for Doggie’s second day and, if it works well, the days ahead:
+ Short morning outing with either play or exploration. + Non-Doggie work until/while he’s calm and sleepy. + First training session of the day for part of breakfast. + Work until/while he’s calm and sleepy again. + Longer outing by himself or with Game and/or Chai to observe, move his body, play, potentially train in public. + Work until/while he’s calm and sleepy again. + More training. + Work until/while he’s calm and sleepy again. + Depending on the day, more training or right into the … + short evening outing. + Calm down and bed time.
Day #1, session #1: revising the suitcase (“¡Maleta!”) and adding distractions
Remember: the goal is for Doggie to default to staying on sidewalks/stop at curbs unless/until released to step off. I’m using the suitcase to explain the basic principle that differences in surface height have meaning.
Doggie did fantastic this morning! Not only did I work up to opening doors and going out of sight while he stayed on the suitcase; I even added Chai as a distraction in the end of the session.
Now Mr. Doggie is chilling out again. I like how quickly he was able to down-regulate after the session. This may be either because he didn’t get a lot of sleep last night or because his morning needs for moving and thinking have been met. Either way – I’ll take it!
The longer outing
We walked to “the”our” park in the next neighborhood over. It was as busy as it gets on Sundays! I had Doggie wear a head halter because I’d seen him pull badly on a collar. He didn’t pull at all, but carried his leash in his mouth and occasionally shook it or gave a tug. No feelings about the head halter at all – he walked in it as if he had done it all his life.
At the park, I let him off. He ignored or politely greeted all dogs we met. He was interested in a sweets-selling stand and tempted to jump on one person who carried a bag of food (our old “Pup-pup-pup!” recall worked again!) He curiously approached about 3 people who encouraged him for pets. He ran after a soccer ball kids played with, but once again called off the moving ball with “Pup-pup-pup!”
Outside of this, he often chose to stay close and make physical contact with me – not out of fear, but because he was clearly over the moon we were out and about together. It feels great to see how strong the early puppyhood relationship we built is showing up so many months later!
On the way back, we worked on “Espera” – “Libre” – “street is lava” with several street crossings. Doggie picked things up fast!
Back home, he quickly relaxed on the cool tile floor. Excellet job, little one!
Toy play!
We’re starting to build interest in interacting with balls! When Doggie doesn’t seem interested in cooperative play – Game to the rescue! I ended the session below the moment I noticed he was about to opt out. Ideally, we’ll never beg our dogs to play (if at all, the other way round!)
The video angle is a bit weird, and in addition, it’s a wide angle video – but you get the idea!
… I don’t remember what else we did that day – not enough note-taking! But I do remember Doggie being very, very cute:
Sweeter dreams!
After a longer evening outing with Game, his second night was already calmer than the first one.
To clarify: letting my off-leash guest approach busy strangers is culturally acceptable in Mexico City (except for certain gentrified and foreigner-heavy neighborhoods.) People will communicate with the dogs they run into rather than expecting the owners to do it for them. ↩︎
The note-taking I’m talking about in the present tense here happened on September 1 – unlike my pre-publish editing of this post, which is happening on September 28, 2024 (right now). My blog posts will often involve some time travel. ↩︎
Last week, I visited Doggie (red collar boy) and his folks. He’s turning into a beautiful dog – strong, full of energy and fearless. He recognized Game and me at once and immediately tried climbing in my lap. Doggie is the puppy who went to live with his father Drago in Naucalpan in Mexico State. Towards the end of week 8, he had been the barkiest of all puppies and the second bitiest one (first place in terms of land-sharkiness was my favorite girl Chispa).
I hadn’t seen Doggie since he moved out, and it was SO cool to meet him again!
Eduardo and their dad mentioned that they’ve been struggling to keep Doggie calm: his energy is boundless and they haven’t let him off leash because unlike their other dogs, Doggie hasn’t picked up the concept of staying on the sidewalk. They have no yard and he doesn’t have the other dogs’ freedom to run, roam, play and train in the public field next to their house because it borders a street. For the same reason, he doesn’t get to go on off leash errand around town.
When leashed, he’ll bite and tug on the leash a lot, and he has learned to get attention by biting shoes and pants. Eduardo’s dad showed me the “battle scars” on their arms: what is to be expected from a bitey little landshark interacting with someone whose skin isn’t young and flexible anymore.
They mentioned that Doggie’s needs for exercise and stimulation were among the highest of any Mal they’ve had (they’ve had quite a few.)
I can’t help but feel proud of the boy: he’s exactly what a Mal should be. But I could see they were struggling to meet his needs, which in turn caused Doggie to struggle to relax. They haven’t found an affordable trainer nearby to help them out. Since I’m not nearby enough either (it’s about an hour’s drive, depending on traffic), we agreed that he’d stay with me for a week, and then we’d do a handover day. If they needed more help, I’d be able to make time or take him for another week in September.
No one has mentioned their puppy getting car sick. I know for sure that at least 2 of them never have; with the other 3, I haven’t had a chance to ask. Our numerous early puppy car adventures may have paid off (or it maybe it’s entirely genetic.)
A week later, I picked up Señorito Doggie without Game and Chai. He was calmer than he had been on my last visit – they had made sure to take him out for a walk before I got there. We drove by my place and I added Game and Chai to the car. Then we headed to Bosque de Aragón. I put a tracker on Doggie (just in case I needed to unexpectedly collect him somewhere) and let them all loose in a big field.
Testing who Doggie has grown up to be at Bosque de Aragón!
He was amazing. He was more interested in staying close to me than anything else, even though he took the world in with interest. For the first 15 minutes or so, he was SO happy to try making physical contact at all times as we walked, tail high and proud, wagging nonstop, shiny eyes! It took some walking until he had convinced himself I wasn’t going anywhere, and started exploring with the others.
It was the weekend, so a little more than usual was going on at Aragón. We walked off leash past joggers, other dogs, ducks, children, a skate park, food stands, bikes, giant animal statues and four-wheeled pedal cars. Doggie was a superstar. He fearlessly followed me up a bunch of stairs (the kind Chai had struggled with in the beginning), fell off on the way down and just kept going like nothing had happened. He remembered his puppy recall (“Pup-pup-pup!”) and turned on a dime whenever I called. First impression: he’s growing up to be a little superstar!
Doggie has the kind of environmental confidence I’ve been hoping for with my extreme early socialization! With this particular puppy/juvenile dog, at this particular moment in time, it looks like I have accomplished this goal. Nothing fazed him – he was neither repelled by nor overly attracted to interesting people and dogs: he had seen it all.
I’m biased, but isn’t he beautiful?
I did, of course, get some shoe biting and jumping for attention – he had learned this skill well since we’d been apart and was generalizing to me lightening fast! For the time being, I picked him up anytime he bit my naked feet (because I wore sandals and it hurt) and set him down again a few steps later. It was management, not training, since he didn’t mind being picked up at all. As we had worked on in the last … I think two weeks with me, in a variation of Julie Daniels’ puppy protocol, he just relaxed and went floppy in my arms to be let down again. When he felt like it, he’d take another run at my feet right away.
This is an interesting observation to me because for many puppies, picking them up can be used as a harmless punisher for unwanted behavior (because they don’t like being picked up.) Not with a puppy – at least not with this puppy – who has been picked up a lot by a lot of people, and built all the positive associations to it!
Back home: a break
Hard to believe, but true: even 5.5 months old Mals fall asleep eventually!
#1 training priority: respect sidewalk boundaries by default
After Doggie resting and me working on non-Doggie stuff, he got his first formal training session for training goal #1, the first priority for his humans: the concept of staying on sidewalks. Before we could work on this out in the world and with actual sidewalks, we needed a few things in our toolkit:
A shared language
A food marker (¡Sí!)
The concept of shaping and/or luring
The concept that offered behaviors pay off (R+)
The concept that “keep doing what you’re doing” pays off
A release cue
The concept of boundaries having meaning
The above would be true for any dog I worked with. In Doggie’s case, I only have a week to teach him what I would otherwise take my time with – perhaps several months. This means I’ll add other elements to our communication to speed up his learning, even if I wouldn’t usually use them. For this particular project, I added
as part of the shared language:
The understanding that offering behaviors can turn off environmental stimuli (R-/escape conditioning in the sense of: if I plug in my seat belt, the car will stop beeping at me.)
The concept that avoiding certain behaviors keeps certain environmental stimuli turned off (P+/avoidance conditioning as in: as long as I don’t unplug my seatbelt, the car will remain silent.)
R- was going to be key in speeding up the learning process. I was confident I’d be able to teach the goal behavior in a week and generalize it to all sidewalks with its help. You’ll find out whether I was right in the posts to come!
I was also sure that I could use R- without emotional fallout for Doggie, in a way that would increase clarity much faster than if I didn’t use it. Maximizing clarity fast would get me results fast. Getting results fast would result in increased life quality for Doggie in the years to come – so my pragmatic math was simple: of course I was going to use whatever I needed to in order to help Doggie archieve the life quality and freedom I wanted him to have.
I taught all parts of our shared language over the course of 3 sessions in the absence of distractions with the help of a suitcase: the suitcase served to explain the basic concept that changes in surface height – such as steps and sidewalks or, in this case, suitcases! – can be meaningful.
Here’s our very first suitcase session. I first attempted to shape Doggie, but since he didn’t know how to chase treats, I quickly went to luring instead. I love teaching dogs to shape, but for our particular project, I knew I’d be faster if I just lured my target behavior and then rewarded.
After the session above, I introduced our release cue (¡Libre!), a cue for going on the suitcase (¡Maleta!) and the P- element (the “floor is lava” game, aka an equivalent to the seat belt beep in a car.)
#2 training goal: an alternative way of asking for attention
Doggie had already learned to get attention by biting shoes/feet and jumping on his humans. I was going to offer him an alternative: sit to ask for what you’d like! I marked and reinforced all his sitting with food and attention that first day.
Typically, this is all I’d do. I’d redirect to a chewable item and withdraw attention for biting and jumping until it just stopped happening. However, since we were on a time crunch – a week, and I wanted to see no more shoe biting at all! – I added …
another part to our shared language:
A punishment marker (¡Alto!)
Not only did jumping and biting my shoes no longer work to get attention – it now produced undesirable consequences. Not results Doggie hated (there’s no need for that); just something he was not looking for under these circumstances, similar to Sarah Stremming’s “milk, not water” analogy. This was simply something we worked on throughout the day, all day, starting on our first day together – as soon as we had gotten home from Aragón, where I had learned that picking up wasn’t undesirable enough.
Luckily, Doggie only bites his humans’ shoes, but not the shoes of strangers – that would have made things a lot harder!
By means of the undesired consequence followed by helping him into a sit if he fell back into his old habits, he started offering his first sits for attention that very evening. I was proud of my smart little snuggler! Apart from biting shoes and feet, he is actually a very snuggly puppy – as long as the attention he needs is provided!
Sound sensitivity?
We had a loud thunderstorm that first evening, and Doggie couldn’t have cared less. I’m SO glad that so far, as far as I know, none of the puppies show noise sensitivities. (Again, I know this for sure about two of them, but haven’t had a chance to ask about the remaining 3.)
That said, Game only became noise sensitive after having moved to Guatemala – so if she’s passed on some of those genes and my early noise-desensitization did not do the trick, it may still develop for the rebeldes later in life. So far so good though!
The first night
… was difficult night for Mr. Doggie. I wondered whether he had separation issues in general (his humans hadn’t mentioned it) or whether being back with me in a place he wasn’t familiar with (this isn’t the apartment or house he grew up in) was just too difficult to sleep through the night. He had a hard time not sharing the bedroom and woke me up a few times.
Game is currently the only dog with bed privileges, and she likes her peace at night. Chai voluntarily puts herself to bed in an open crate in a different room when she’s ready to sleep. I had Doggie sleep in Chai’s room, but he found it difficult to settle there. I was pretty sure Doggie would sleep peacefully in my bed, but just to be safe, I’d want Game elsewhere if he was there. That didn’t seem fair to her. I decided to give Doggie sleeping in Chai’s space another try our second night rather than giving in to his snuggle wishes just yet.
Update: I asked, and was told Doggie didn’t have separation issues at home. That’s great to know! I’m glad he doesn’t. This greatly increased the probability that he’d settle more and more peacefully in Chai’s room in the nights to come!
This week is the last week for most of my little rebeldes – except for Chispa, who will likely move out in week 9. A student just asked how I feel about the puppies leaving. I’ll have to think about it some more once I have … well, time to think! The FDSA term just ended yesterday and for the first time in weeks, I’ll be able to catch a breath … not today because I have plenty of stuff to catch up on, but hopefully tomorrow. Back to today:
7 weeks, 1 day (May 13)
Morning socializing
As planned, we headed to the town square and got there at 7:30 in the morning, giving us half an hour out. It was busier than on Sunday (it’s Monday today.) We saw plenty of school children. Several people stopped to pet the puppies, and the puppies followed a few folks and were enchanted with someone’s shoe laces. They ventured further and were significantly more confident than yesterday already. I suspect this is partly because they are recognizing the location as familiar by now. Mostly new folks, but the same place.
Everyone met 1.5 dogs (I’m counting 1.5 because everyone met the first one, but I don’t think every single puppy met the second one – for one, Chispa did not. I’ll make sure she gets an extra dog encounter when I get the chance.) Here’s the one everyone met:
The second one was an injured Pitbull who didn’t get up, but was gently sniff-greeted by those who wanted. We saw three more dogs, but they just passed in the distance.
The puppies played with each other in the gazebo and had a great time trying to latch on to my sandals and the belts of the carrier. Playful and confident! Everyone ate kibble and followed my pup-pup-pup recall.
Fierro really is currently the most barky when it comes to other dogs. He’s eager to approach, but he likes to bark as he does so. Game was like this as well: she very much liked hearing herself talk as a puppy. Bravo is currently THE most confident (almost always the first to approach novelty), and not barky along the way, followed by Oso and Fierro. Rebelde has shown a fair amount of curiosity as well these last 2 days. She’ll approach humans and dogs and venture pretty far. Right now, Chispa is the one who is least interested in approaching and most interested in watching from a distance – she and Rebelde have switched the roles they held last week!
Because of this, Chispa got pet less by strangers this morning, and she is the only one I know for sure didn’t sniff our second dog (and only sniffed the first one because I held her up to them, like last night’s Chihuahua.)
Chispa’s solo adventure
To boost her exposure, I took Chispa on an out-of-crate solo adventure once we had gotten home, and the lovely store person next door held here while I was rummaging through my pockets for money. Humans for Chispa this week: +1!
Who’s the most noise sensitive right now?
Right as I got home from this afternoon’s ice cream hunt, we heard a siren – and Rebelde ran off. At this moment, she still seems the most noise sensitive even if she’s overtaken Chispa’s and perhaps Fierro’s confidence in other aspects. All other dogs in the yard were completely chill and kept playing though, which, I hope, will have set an excellent example for Rebelde!
… at this moment may have been the key phrase in the paragraph above: when we went to Mercado Hidalgo, the town’s cra-zy Monday market I discovered today, folks were just packing up. Someone was taking down a metal structure and throwing the poles to the side, making very loud noises. Chispa ran off, but Rebelde didn’t!
Who’s the barkiest?
No doubt there: right now, the barkiest puppy is Fierro. He has been barking at dogs, and at Mercado Hidalgo, he barked at a teen who approached him. The dog-barking didn’t go along with insecure body language, but the teen-barking did. I venture he’s – right now, today – the kind of dog who likes expressing himself in words. Tomorrow, he may be a different puppy entirely – or not. We’ll see!
Every puppy got a frozen chicken foot to chew on today. I gave them a little time to get into it and then approached, announced “Let’s trade,” bent down, rudely took away the chicken foot, immediately fed a raw meatball and then gave back the chicken foot right away and left. Every puppy got two rounds of this while working on their chicken feet. Rebelde, by the way, was the only one who finished hers completely, in one go and FAST!
I videoed the first two puppies – Bravo and Fierro. Note how in this video, I make sure that the first indicator of me taking the food is the verbal “Let’s trade” announcement. Only then do I bend down. And only once I have bent down and taken the chew do I whip out the even better snack: a raw meatball. This order of events is what you’ll want to aim for if working on this protocol with your own puppy or puppies.
Also, the punching bag in the top right corner of the last clip? It comes with this place. I’ve never had a punching bag. I tried it the other day – feels surprisingly good to have a go at the thing!
Handling and husbandry
Everyone got the nails on their left front paws done and worked through the handling protocol along the way. I recorded the first puppy, who happened to be Rebelde. She also happened to be one of the two most relaxed ones (Rebelde and Chispa.) Everyone else struggled a little – not because of fear but because they had better things to do. It is SO obvious how different this is from a puppy who is afraid of a husbandry procedure. I love that we’ve got this foundation now. Based on it, folks can either build a “no choice” routine (“When I say we do these things, we will – that’s it”) OR cooperative care. Whichever way a puppy’s future human(s) go, they will NOT have to countercondition discomfort or fear before getting to work on the actual behavior (be it the dog opting in or the dog learning to hold still when told to do so.) That should give everyone a major shortcut in the husbandry department! Of course, a new person will have to first win the puppy’s trust, but I’d venture that it will go relatively fast, especially since the new humans will soon be with their puppies – and the puppies still young!
The one thing I forgot in the video above was the “needle” protocol. I got it in later! Note how I announce everything I do before doing it: “Collar off” – “nails” – “brush” – “paws” – “teeth” – “eyes” – “ears” – “collar on.” (The needle announcement is “needle,” and before picking up a dog, I say, “up.”) Announcements are not cues – they are what I use if I am about to do something and don’t want to surprise the dog. Over time, dogs learn what different announcements mean. If you leave a tiny pause between announcement and action, you will be able to see how your dog feels about what you’re about to do based on their body language.
Late afternoon/evening outing: Mercado Hidalgo
I took four instead of five puppies tonight: Bravo stayed home. He’s ahead on the human count and usually gets the most attention because he is outgoing. Leaving him home gave me a chance to focus on the others. Plus four puppies are significantly easier to keep track of (and carry) than five!
We were going to go to the town square again, but came across the tianguis Carla had mentioned happened on Mondays. We took the opportunity to wander through parts of it. It was WILDLY crazy – more so than any of the ones I’ve been to with Chai during her remedial socialization time.
On this particular outing, we experienced: the most crowded space yet (the subway has been similarly crowded, but the puppies stayed in the carrier there – now, they were out, following me on the ground and trying not to lose me – not an easy feast in the midst of the chaotic market!) Children running and crying, dogs, fruit, meat, fried stuff, random objects on sale, people carting, carrying, dragging and pushing all kinds of transport concoctions around, people taking down large tarps as well as metal scaffolding, someone carrying a ladder, someone using crutches, a kid carrying a doll, kid cars you activate by throwing in a coin and that make noise when you – a puppy – get close, various people talking to me (about the puppies), people reaching for them and petting them, hopping on and off the curb, trash on the ground (which the puppies had fun picking up, tasting and carrying), cigarette smoke, pup-pup-pup recalls and working hard to not lose me. It was a wild ride, and they did great.
Some of the many, many things we saw, smelled, heard and people and dogs we met. The highlights were finding a mango stone with delicious mango bits left on it and a greasy paper bag.
When we got home, I heard Bravo whine. I had left him with Chai in the bathroom, but he was clearly not happy. I am sorry, Bravo.
Crate training
Oso
did his 20 minutes in the carrier! Superpuppy!
Rebelde
complained again at first – but only for five minutes or so. MUCH improved from yesterday!
Fun things
… we have time for now that I’m on break: I tried getting a photo of everyone, including me, to have a memory. I’ll give this another try while we’re still all together – two more days – and hope that one of these days, I’ll end up with a picture I like.
Look at Fierro!
7 weeks, 2 days (May 14)
Morning adventure
We got up bright and early and headed to the town square. I left Oso with Game today. The puppies are SO big now that it’s nearly impossible to carry 5 at a time, but 4 still works.
Everyone who came along for our outing got 1/3 of a human again. Fierro gets an entire human because … well, let me get to this a little further down!
They all also got 1/3 of a dog because we saw about 6 or 7 of them, watched, approached a little but didn’t directly interact. Fierro gets an entire dog in addition because he walked up to the injured Pitbull and sniffed them from up close (not after barking at them for a bit, not eliciting a response.)
On the way home, I took a little detour and stopped at the corner where my free-roaming friends live (the ones I feed when I walk past with Game and Chai, and who by now are happy to see us.) I held Chispa and she got sniffed by 3 all at once. Because I held her (she didn’t look like she wanted to be placed down) and initially stiffened (but quickly relaxed), I’ll count 2 rather than 3 of the dogs for her. I also got out Bravo. He got placed on the ground and voluntarily sniffed one of the dogs. +2 dogs for Chispa and +1 for Oso before we headed home!
How Fierro earned himself +1 human this morning
Right as we were headed back to the car, someone grabbed Fierro (who was maybe a meter ahead of me) and started crossing the street, walking fast. I yelled at them; they stopped. I demanded they give back my dog. They handed him over and then said something about the puppy having been on the ground, alluding that dogs on the ground are up for grabs (this dog wears a collar with a dog tag and I was clearly right behind him. Seriously.)
I was curious, so I calmly asked if they had tried to make a joke by pretend-stealing my dog or if they had actually attempted to take the puppy. (They were acting righteously and laughed and postured at me, which made me consider the joke option.) They said they would have taken the puppy. I couldn’t tell if it was true or still part of a bad joke because they kept throwing the occasional laugh in there. I loaded everyone in the car and turned around to see that person staring at me, so I looked them straight in the eyes and told them to go fuck themselves before I drove off. Our species? It’s the strangest one I know.
Barkiness right now
On this morning’s outing, Fierro was the most barky. He barked at all new dogs we met. Not necessarily fearfully, but with tentativeness. What I – not a developmental psychologist, just an observer who has read a lot (most of which wasn’t about dogs because there’s a lack of studies – we tend to study rodents and humans instead) – suspect I am seeing is that Fierro’s ability to experience fear is currently increasing. He is a little more barky today than yesterday because he is able to physiologically experience fear a little more strongly than he was yesterday. And, being Game’s son, he expresses his feelings in words.
This doesn’t mean that Fierro is going to grow up to be fearful or fear-aggressive. It means Fierro is at a point where I would not “force” an interaction. He’s at the point where it’s important to take things at his pace. Because he’s had a lot of socialization experiences and has confident canine relatives, chances are that taking things at his pace will be all that is needed. There are no guarantees, of course, and if a few days of taking things at Fierro’s pace don’t make a difference, my solution would be to teach him CU games and help him cope with the world that way. Since he is THIS young, the CU games may only be needed temporarily.
What I would not do is either force interactions he isn’t comfortable with on him (he’s “too far along” for this in terms of fear development) or completely shelter him from the outside world (his ability to experience fear cannot – or so I assume – be fully developed yet.) We still want to cash in on these early opportunities where the fear response is weak. I’d expect it not to be fully developed for another week or so. But then again – not a biologist here. Just a layperson, so take what I say with a brimful salt shaker.
If I was to keep Fierro, I’d orchestrate lots of dog encounters like the ones we had this morning: where he gets to choose if and how far he wants to approach, and the dogs don’t care at all that there’s a tiny puppy barking at them. He’d learn two things: one, dogs aren’t threatening, and two, barking has no consequence.
This is our puppy/dog video from this morning. Note that Fierro chooses to walk up to the dog on the platform. I haven’t encouraged him to do so. He goes up, he barks, nothing happens. Only towards the very end (unfortunately, Fierro happens to be barking at that moment too) do the free roamers get up to leave because they’ve seen another dog friend they want to greet. It’s not ideal that this coincided with Fierro’s barking (I don’t want him to learn that barking makes dogs go away), but apart from this, these dogs made amazing helpers and I hope Fierro learned a valuable lesson: dogs are okay. Bark at them, don’t bark at them … they’re just doing their thing. (Free roaming dogs are the most dog savvy dogs I’ve met anywhere in the world.)
Morning crate training
Fierro
had a go at his 20 minutes in the morning. I was hesitant to do it in the morning because by the time we were back from our adventure, I had had coffees #2 and #3, jotted down notes from this morning and had a good play session with the big dogs, it was a little after 9AM and starting to get warm. I know from experience that hot puppies are not happy in carriers (understandably; the airflow in there has got to be less cooling than outside on the cold concete or cool dirt or grass, where they could otherwise choose to rest.) However, since Fierro seemed so sleepy (while everyone else was still active! Their rhythms are starting to diverge!), I gave it a go. And he DID it! About halfway in, he mumbled something to himself and changed positions in the carrier and then went back to sleep. Since this kind of mumbling also happens with sleepy animals changing positions outside of carriers, I don’t mind. He was in no rush to get out after his 20 minutes – I lifted him out and he went right back to sleep on the cool concrete.
This catches Fierro up to Oso! Both boys have succeeded at 20 minutes and will be doing 25 next! I’m hoping for tonight. If all goes well, this will allow us to complete half an hour – my goal – before going back to Mexico City Thursday morning!
Who’ll get to go on future 3-dog adventures (there are 3 more before we head back to the city?)
Chispa needs her outings the least: she is going to stay with me past 8 weeks and come to the city with Fierro and Oso, which will go hand in hand with plenty of human and dog interactions. Fierro and Oso will also come to the city and likely meet a bunch of dogs and people there. I’m confident I can bring their count up to 7 before one of the boys leaves on Saturday – especially as I’ll invite Carla (and whoever of her kids is home) over again tomorrow so they can say goodbye. If Axel is around, we’ll get two people per puppy; if not, at least one!
This leaves Bravo and Rebelde. I’m not particularly concerned about Bravo. He has been SO confident that I’m positive he is ready to take the world in stride (OR his fear response hasn’t set in yet, which will also further set him up for success.) He is also going to meet a “new” (well, not that new, but we’ll count him!) person – Alan – on Thursday, and also hang out with Alan’s Border Collie Kiba again.
Rebelde is going to meet a new person on Thursday as well: Irving’s sister. I don’t know if they have a dog or will introduce Rebelde to anyone else before Irving comes back from Chiapas on the 28th. So I’ll want to get as many experiences for Rebelde in as I can before then. She’s the priority, especially as far as dogs are concerned.
This means Rebelde gets to go on every 4-dog outing we’ll have before we leave Teotihuacán. I’ll also bring her if the tamales person is around today and ask them to hold her again, or if I’m going to a store. On tomorrow morning’s free-roamer stop, if I get around to it, it’s Rebelde who I’ll take out to meet my friends on the way home.
Fierro will also get to come on all outings, simply because the free-roamers we’ve got here are going to be non existent in his potential home in the US (in case that’s where he ends up going – it’s a tie between him and Oso), and they are perfect for him at his barky stage.
As for everyone else, I’ll probably rotate through.
A new toy, play, and trading the toy to prevent toy guarding!
We broke out our third fancy toy today: the duck. Everyone loved it; it seems to be made of a material that’s particularly fun to bite into. After letting them have fun with it by themselves, I did a solo play session with Rebelde, Fierro, Bravo and Chispa. After letting them win the duck, I let them have it for a little bit (the time it took to head inside and get meat from the fridge), then traded for a raw meatball and then gave back the toy. Oso will get his turn tomorrow!
Evening adventure
I went on a 3-dog adventure tonight. Taking 3 is SO much easier now that they are this big and active! Three are totally manageable! I took Fierro, Rebelde and Oso. They all did great. We met two dogs each. Fierro barked at both of them, and they ignored him – perfect! After a little barking, Fierro met them along with the others. He was confident and seemingly felt good. We hung out with one of the dogs for about 15 minutes and there was quite some interaction – this other dog was interested in the puppies too (and in my treats.) She also corrected the puppies appropriately with a growl-bark and fast head movement when they went for a piece of chicken she had (while being perfectly content to watch them eat kibble from my hand in turn with her.) It keeps fascinating me that many dogs seem to respect a concept similar to temporary ownership. I say temporary because when it comes to toys, they’ll often be up for grabs as long as they aren’t in use by anyone, but off the table for everyone else once one dog has them. Note that this is NOT the case for all dogs – some want all the resources to themselves while others let anyone steal their toys. Some respect others’ objects/food while others do not. I’ve seen this kind of respect and boundary-setting often enough though to know that it is very much a thing among dogs – just not among all of them. For lack of a better word, I’d call it a part of their culture!
Fierro, Rebelde and Oso: hanging out with dogs and being stroked to sleep by kids.
The puppies saw lots of different humans and got touched by a few, and saw me talk to several ones. We ended up spending about 20 minutes with four lovely kids. The youngest was three (as the oldest informed me.) The oldest may have been around 7 and the other two in between. They were very gentle and lovely with the puppies. The oldest made sure to give everyone equal amounts of pets. They stroked them to sleep and kept hanging out with us. Because there was so much touch and interaction, I’m counting tonight as +1 human, even in the absence of being picked up, for everyone who went on our adventure.
Evening crate training
Fierro
I waited till Fierro had fallen asleep and then aimed for 25 minutes. I expected him to be more tired and had him go first since he had been on our evening adventure while Oso hadn’t. Fierro settled into the carrier comfortably … for 20 minutes. Then he woke up and started complaining at a level 1, escalating to noise level 3 after 2.5 more minutes. The last minute was a level 4, pretty nonstop. He’ll take another stab at 25 minutes next time.
Something interesting has happened yesterday and today: if I was going to keep Fierro or he was the only puppy I crate-trained, I would have let him cry it out today, like Rebelde at the baby gate yesterday. I know he feels safe being close to all of us, the temperature is as okay as it gets these days, and I absolutely feel that now, unlike in the past, the possibility for operant learning is high (operant learning in the sense that the puppy develops the superstition that barking causes the carrier to open.)
Since I am crate training two puppies, I just don’t have the time to let both of them cry it out. I need to switch them after their respective time (in this case 25 minutes.) It’ll be interesting to see if this sets Fierro back on our next go.
Oso
started out great. After 15 minutes, he changed positions and made a peep of talking to himself, but then settled right in again. Sadly, about 5 minutes later, he started whining calmly. Not upset, but not super happy. After calming down a little, he escalated to noise level 2. With 5 minutes left, he went up to a 3. I was tempted to let him cry it out after having taken out Fierro before – but no. I’ll stick to my plan of sticking to a certain time period and see how that goes, and if the puppies do – or don’t – develop superstitious whining. Unlike Fierro, Oso periodically calmed down again between fits of whining, but then went out with brief level 5 screams.
Fierro again
I gave Fierro a second go at 25 minutes. I really thought I’d be able to work up to half an hour for each of them before Joan got here, so … this is me trying to still reach this goal even though I’m running out of time. He settled in comfortably right away, so even though he screamed when I let him out the last time, he has no negative associations with the carrier as such. A good start!
… it’s 25 minutes later and I just had to wake Fierro! He DID it! Go superpuppy!! Next and last goal: 30 minutes.
Oso
got another go as well because I’m feeling confident after Fierro’s turn. Even though I’m ready to fall asleep, I’ll stay up 25 more minutes in the hope that we’ll succeed!
… and just like that, it’s 25 minutes later and Oso was the one I just woke up! Woohoo!! They both did it!
7 weeks, 3 days (May 15)
3-puppy morning adventure
Find the puppies!
I took Fierro, Rebelde and Chispa. Everyone met 2 dogs and saw a bunch of humans – but not enough to count. So 0 new humans and 2 new dogs for the three rebeldes this quiet morning at the town square! I finally got the picture of everyone in front of the Teotihuacán letters I’d been meaning to get. They all ate, tried to tug on my pants and tugged on my bag. The person who’d tried taking Fierro yesterday wasn’t there. Rebelde and Chispa crossed a street for the first time!
Fierro continues in his current approach to new dogs: bark as he walks up to them. Once again, we met two dogs who did not care one bit. I’m so grateful for these calm free-roamers who’ll just let him do his thing! I tried interrupting his barking with a food scatter, and he was able to eat, too – so not a fear response (I venture.) Today was the first day Rebelde followed suit and tried two or three barks at the second dog after Fierro started. Then she lost interest in barking again.
A stop with a helpful free roamer, unimpressed by Fierro’s barking, before heading back to our temporaryhome.
Duck tug – resource guarding prevention for Oso
When we got back home, Oso got his round of tugging on the duck, taking the duck away, trading for a raw meatball and getting the duck back. He did great:
Morning crate training
Fierro
mastered 30 minutes of sleeping in the carrier! Go puppy! Achievement unlocked!
Oso
started complaining after about 10 minutes. In our long-standing tradition, I left him in the carrier for his 30 minutes anyways and then let him out. He never escalated to top level, but did go back and forth between 10-second stretches of quiet, 2 and 3. Oso and I will take another stab at 30 minutes tonight!
Food bowl resource guarding prevention for everyone
Visitors
Carla and little Emmerson came over in the afternoon to see all the puppies one last time before the first ones go to their new humans. Oso and Chispa slept under the car and didn’t feel like coming out in the heat. Fierro barked at Carla while greeting her, and Bravo quickly followed suit. Emmerson then ran around the yard and for the first time, Fierro chased after him: best! game! ever! Luckily, he didn’t catch up with Emmerson – I don’t want them to feel those playful sharky teeth! Bravo joined the chase a little later, but Carla and I quickly stopped it – i.e. we stopped Emmerson, which is easier than stopping a Mal puppy on a mission!
Rebelde, Fierro and Bravo all got held for a minute by Carla – plus one human for the three of them! I tried calling the other two out from under the car, but they were too sleepy. They woke for a moment though, so they were at least aware that we had visitors and, I hope, got to benefit from a distance. Relaxing in the presence of visitors is a good exercise too.
Carla and Oso … and the bracelets Carla made for me! Thank you, Carla!!They are awesome!
Evening adventure
For our last 3-puppy adventure in town, I took Rebelde, Fierro and Bravo. Bravo and Rebelde got touched by two different strangers, and everyone saw kids running and screaming, a bike and lots of different adults strolling and sitting on benches in the twilight. I’ll count 1/3 of a human for each puppy who got petted.
Everyone also met a dog who was very gentle with the puppies. She showed up so fast that Fierro didn’t have time to bark. Only after greeting her did he remember his new approach to dogs and started barking. She stayed and wagged until he had calmed down again. Thank you very much! Dogs +1 for Fierro, Rebelde and Bravo!
Evening crate training
After spending half an hour in sleep-deprived toddler mode, chasing each other through the house and getting in all kinds of trouble (pulling on electrical cords, tugging on sandals, finding a domino piece under the couch, toppling over a bucket and climbing in it, getting themselves tangled up in a medieval torture device metal contraption for garrafónes, trying to climb on all the furniture, climbing on a metal shelf, pulling on my underwear, redecorating the floor with a sweater and pants and dragging a remote control out into the yard, they all fell asleep. I woke …
Oso
… and transferred him into the carrier. Timer’s set to 30 minutes. Let’s see if we manage this time!
… he DID it! Go Oso!! Archievement unlocked for both the boys! YAY! Just in time!
7 weeks, 4 days (May 16)
Names (again again)
Someone laughed at Fierro’s name tonight. I know fierro is also a slang word for dick, but I’ve never heard it used that way and both Carla and Axel thought the name was cool (I ran it by them to make sure.) They thought the dick connotation was super regional and I shouldn’t worry about it; if at all, it was the good kind of funny. Anyways, because he got laughed at (and not in a way that I like), I decided to change his for-the-moment name before he goes to Eduardo. I love my puppies; no making fun of them! For the time being, I’ll go back to Red when interacting with Spanish speakers.
Morning road trip
Right after an early breakfast, Game, the 5 puppies and I hit the road. Chai stayed behind to be looked after by Carla and Axel for a few days. We had two stops along the way and wanted to get the drive done before it got too hot!
Rebelde
Our first stop was in Vallejo, CDMX: Rebelde’s stop! She is going to stay with Irving’s sister for a few days while he is competing in Chiapas. Rebelde was happy to get out of the car and meet Dalay! +1 new human for Rebelde – and we’ve gotten lovely updates since then! I’ll share them under today’s heading because this was her last day with me, but some of them are from Friday and Saturday. Rebelde also met Dalay’s and Irving’s cousin and has been settling in beautifully! She is being showered with love and her extended new family is already very much in love with her:
Rebelde’s human and dog count for the week: 6 humans and almost 8 dogs. I didn’t meet the human goal this week because I didn’t have her with me all week – but we got an extra dog in. And it’s possible that someone else met Rebelde before the week ended; I’m only counting the humans I know about. In any case – she’s doing great and will have another new adventure soon when Irving gets back and she moves to his place!
Rebelde’s going away presents, apart from a blanket that smells of Game and her siblings, were the dinosaur toy and the furminator I’ve gotten the puppies used to.
Bravo
Our second stop was at Alan’s place where Bravo won’t only meet his future family – Alan’s dad and brother – but also see Kiba again! Bravo, of course, was confident as always! I’m counting +3 humans and +1 dog. He’ll even go to another new location and meet another new human on the weekend as he heads to “his” rancho outside Toluca and meets Alan’s niece!
Bravo’s human and dog count for the week: almost 4 dogs (his goal was 6) and 6 humans (his goal was, like everyone else’s, 7.) In Bravo’s case, I don’t worry about not meeting the goal: he’s been SO confident lately. It is also possible that he met an additional dog (Alan’s mom’s old little mix) and additional human or two (Alan’s mom and sister in law). I’m not counting them because I don’t know for sure. In that case, he’d have exceeded his human goal for the week and be only one dog short.
Bravo’s going away gift apart from a blanket smelling of Game and his siblings: the giraffe toy. He gets the biggest toy because he will live with kids, and they will need something for him to bite when playing! (Alan’s youngest niece is, I believe, 13 – old enough for a Malinois household. As long as they’re armed with a good dangly-legs giraffe toy, that is!)
Game, Red, Chispa and Oso
The four of us headed on home to the apartment. I had time to shower, eat a bite, walk Game around the block and feed everyone lunch before a quick apartment cleaning, and then Joan got here! The exciting part of the day was about to begin because Joan wass going to decide between Red and Oso, based on the temperament I’ve observed over the last few days, what Joan will observe over the next two days they spend adventuring and playing with the puppies and me and a structural evaluation via video call with Joan’s dogs’ rehab and conditioning expert!
We watched an old Chris Zink webinar to figure out how to stack puppies (and had a few good laughs), I probably talked Joan’s ears off telling them everything I could think of about the puppies that wasn’t on the blog yet, and then the boys had their stacking session on a puzzle mat on my fridge. The canine sports expert thought Oso had better structure for a long and injury-free agility career. This coincides with my answer to what puppy I would place in a sports home “right now” (the answer differs all the time.) The structural evaluation rests on Oso’s front angulation, which is similar to Game’s (we had her looked at too.) The boys did their stacking with the help of eating their very first hotdog, and they loved it!
My behavioral answer is that Red is currently barky and Oso is not. Red’s barkiness may not be fear related – he’ll often go up to another dog confidently while barking – but it’s just easier to have a sports dog who’s less barky; it allows you to focus on other behaviors rather than on being quiet. And just in case nerviness is part of what inspires the barking – that’s not what we want in a sports dog either.
Pictures above by Joan. It was nice to outsource photo documentation! Game and Chai say thank you for the gift toys (one of which is in the top right picture by Red’s sleepy feet!)
I know the other boy will have a more predictable routine with familiar routes and familiar people in it, so working through any barkiness that might crop up will be easier than it will be for an athlete who may travel to compete and meet different judges, stewards, sports people and dogs for the rest of his life.
The sports and rehab expert said Red would not be a bad choice either, but they liked Oso’s structure a bit better. So before making a decision, we were going to have puppy adventures so Joan could see the puppies out and about as well!
Evening adventure
We took the two boys to Fresa Parque and then to dinner on a patio. The staff there recognized them because they had been part of the socialization team and were happy to dote on the puppies. I don’t think anyone else held them, so I’m counting 1/3 of a human and 1/3 of a dog for both puppies. They saw dogs in the park and sniffed from a small distance and also next to us on the patio, but didn’t have direct contact with any. They were lazy at the park, but woke up at the patio: it was cooler now and they were ready for action! They got to explore around a stripe of bushes between the patio and the sidewalk, and also on the floor inside the place (where a little kid offered Red their teddy bear and he bit into the teddy bear … and the poor kid started crying. The teddy bear was unharmed, but the puppy hadn’t known that this was a “look, don’t touch” kind of deal. Neither had we humans. I’m sorry, little kid and teddy bear!
Both puppies had a little bit of kibble at the patio too. It was so much fun to see how fast they came running anytime I pup-pup-pup called them if they ventured too far! I reinforced their puppy recalls with serrano ham from my plate, and then they were off again to explore some more. They even found the restaurant’s water bowl and dove in for a drink!
Back home, everyone was wild and crazy and bitey. Joan got to see Chispa and her brothers running around being their crazy playful selves, and Game occasionally correcting them for nursing in a way that was painful.
7 weeks, 5 days (May 17)
Names (again again again)
I’ve changed Red’s name: he’s Mr. President. I unthinkingly called him this today and … it fit! It’s a fun name, and not one people will laugh at. I know Eduardo will give him his own name – he has one prepared that he’ll use if it fits! – but for now, Red is going to be Mr. President to Spanish speakers, and I’ll introduce him as Mr. President to Eduardo and Drago.
Morning adventure
We took all three puppies to Parque de las Arboledas before it got hot. There was A LOT of dog and people traffic! The remaining three rebeldes got touched by lots of different people and met different dogs. Mr. President kept being a little barky – but less so than earlier this week! His barkiness is going down!
He and Oso were the first to approach new people and dogs, and Chispa usually followed suit right away. No barking from her and Oso. I’m counting (and I’m making this up because I didn’t keep count) +3 dogs and +1 person per puppy.
A rare occasion where parts of ME are in the pictures (because Joan took them). No other dogs or people because I took another day off videoing and taking pictures, and Joan’s pictures focus on the puppies – the action was all around us though!
We made a shrine of everything the puppies found and took into their mouth during this morning’s outing. All cigarettes are curtesy of Oso. He’s a smoker, and he’s starting young! Not sure what doG to dedicate this shrine to – it’s up for grabs, all you doGs out there! Assembled with lots of love by Joan, Caden, Oso, Mr. President and Chispa:
Making art with your friends is good for “the soul.”
Evening adventure
After both watching them rest and playing some more with all three puppies, Joan made their decision: Oso will be their puppy!
For his solo evening adventure, Oso – whose name, as can be revealed now, is going to be Judge! – went to the vet’s. He got his third vet exam and a clean health certificate. He was confident and did well, and fell asleep on the table! Now that is one relaxed dog at the vet’s:
Purple Bear says, “Vets? Easy!”
We met two friends for dinner after the vet visit. One of them held Judge again and he got pet by both. So on this evening adventure, we got +2 humans for Judge! Again, there was a dog at the next table over as well. Judge did great and didn’t care: he slept through most of dinner in his carrier and then explored a little on the sidewalk and found the dog water bowl in the restaurant entry.
My food and Joan with Judge at Utopia! No, I don’t usually take pictures of my food. I also don’t usually eat food that looks fancy, so when I do …spinach lasagna!
Tomorrow, Judge will fly! His journey home is going to be the most exciting one since he’ll be on two plances (there’s a layover), three airports, touch two US states and meet Joan’s partner, all in one afternoon/evening!
7 weeks, 6 days (May 18)
The puppies played in the apartment in the morning, giving Judge a chance to get out his energy! Chispa was the last one standing after her brothers passed out:
Then we headed to the airport. After checking in, we gave Judge a chance to pee outside the airport – and he did so pretty much right away! He also explored, found another cigarette butt (oh boy, you really are starting young!), watched cars go by and then decided he was ready to rest – right in time for Joan to get in line for security. I waited until the two of them had made it to the other side of security before heading home.
Seeing Judge off after check-in at the airport!
My first update when Joan and Judge had reached the gate: one Very Good Puppy waiting to board! (He’s in the carrier I trained them with, has – like every puppy – a little blanket that smells of Game and his siblings, and one of the fancy puppy toys I got for the rebels.)From the looks of it, Judge approves of his travel arrangements!
A thought on airports past and present
Judge is the third puppy to leave, and the most difficult for me. On the way to the airport and when assisting Joan in checking in and anything else we were able to do pre-security, I was sad. Not about the puppy. I’m excited about the home Judge is going to. He’ll have a most excellent life. Not only that – he’ll meet several of my colleagues and students in person (he’s going to an FDSA hotspot) and he may show up in my online classes!
Being Joan and Judge’s airport person reminded me of the time I was someone’s virtual airport person when they picked up a puppy and went through their own puppy airport odyssee. They’re no longer in my life. I’d have been perfectly happy having stayed someone who, from a great distance, virtually joined their occasional dog adventure and vice versa in between talking life. As Judge leaves, I get to be sad that did not happen.
Here is Judge’s first friend in Joan’s house: Didi! The video below is from Sunday (May 19), but I’ll add it to Judge’s chapter on his going-home day here – the day he took off on his big adventure!
Judge’s human and dog count for the week: a little over 9 humans and a little over 9 dogs. Weekly goal more than met!
And here’s another update from Monday! The giant Lab puppy is only 16 weeks old. He’s a service dog puppy Joan and Terri are fostering for another week or so. Lucky Judge has got his very own puppy play friend right at home!
Husbandry and handling
After getting home from the airport, I did a round of handling with Chispa and Mr. President. They were being amazing, and for the first time, I clipped the nails on all 4 paws in a single session each. None of them complained even a little bit! Mr. President completely relaxed in my arms on his back, belly up and let me work through all his nails in one go! Superpuppy!
8 weeks (May 19)
Game, Mr. President, Chispa and I got up at 6 and were on the road to Naucalpan half an hour later!
Mr. President
Today was Mr. President’s big day: he went to live with his dad Drago and their human! Both he and Chispa got to meet their dad (who was very excited about the puppies and a bit much for them (the joyful-excited kind of much.) Chispa got held and met her brother’s human as well, counting +1 human and +1 dog for her today. Mr. President, for his part, did not only meet Drago and Eduardo, but also Eduardo’s dad. Two humans, one dog for him at 8 weeks old! AND a new environment: Eduardo’s dad’s car repair shop with tires and tools and all the sounds!
The picture on the right is an update I got a few hours after dropping off Mr. President. He’s already snuggling with his new human and fitting right in!
Mr. President’s dog and human count for the week: a little over 10 humans and a little over 13 dogs. Weekly goal more than met!
Chispa, Game and I carried on back to Teotihuacán for a few more days. Chai was VERY excited to have me back, and Chispa was VERY excited to see Chai! Thank you again, Carla and Axel, for taking care of my girl while I was gone!
Chai looks particularly good now: I used the undercoat rake I had asked Joan to bring me from the US. She’s been shedding, and I brushed out her “pants” with the new rake today!
Chispa
On the drive, we stopped for gas and Chispa got to explore a little around the highway rest stop. She saw a huge truck leave the gas station, several people walking in and out of the little convenience store, smelled gas and tentatively approached a free-roamer sleeping under a bush. The dog very gently curled their lips – almost inperceptibly. Chispa read them well and did not approach further, but went back to sniffing in the other direction. Love a socially savvy puppy!
She was a bit less confident by herself than she has been with her siblings, and seemed a little taken aback by the fact that Mr. President, who had only just been in the crate with her, was no longer there. I’m not counting the gas station dog for Chispa since there was no direct interaction, but I am proud of her for reading the canine stranger so well!
The most interesting thing so far this morning was Chai’s response after greeting Chispa. She kept going back to the car and putting her front feet up on the doors. This isn’t something she usually does, and there was no food inside that might have prompted her to mistake it for a car-shaped food toy. I’m pretty sure she was looking for the other puppies!
Game, for her part, seems perfectly happy to only have one puppy left. She played with Chai when Chai asked her to, I played a little with the two big dogs (before the heat got too much!), and now the three of them are resting contently in the shade.
Chispa’s human and dog count for the week: 7 humans and a little over 10 dogs. Human goal met, dog goal more than met!
Mops on a mission: an update on Caden’s don’t-eat-me protocol
I couldn’t post an update while in the city because I’m using diluted bleach there – not great for puppy mouths. But here’s Chispa today, wildly awake, when we got back to Teotihuacán! I’m using Roma with the Teotihuacán mop. It’s the miracle everything-cleaning-powder almost everyone in Mexico uses because it’s dirt cheap and works for everything from dishes to sidewalks to cars to laundry to watering plants after you’ve used it for something else. Dogs lick sidewalks that have been cleaned that way when they are thirsty and the sidewalks are wet. Birds drink it from potholes. So I don’t worry about puppies having Roma-water-mop fleece in their mouths as the agua del día.
Look at THAT difference! Chispa was the first one to be extremely bitey, and Mr. President caught up to her. The two of them were least interested in the mop and most interested in eating my feet. Only one puppy left to demonstrate how far we have come (when the right mop is near), but YAY!
The first time I come outside in this video is to demonstrate the mop protocol in action: moving around a space I share with a little shark and going about my day, having her sink her mouth full of kitchen knives into the mop rather than my feet and legs. The second time I come outside, it’s to turn off the camera.
Time to start training and fun stuff!
8 weeks is when I like getting puppies myself. If a puppy has been well socialized with their first human, socialization stays important, but can now become a little less of a priority than it was in the last few weeks: we get to do fun stuff now, like learning marker cues, how to follow a lure and toy play! When Chispa was awake again, we practiced some of these skills – I’ll share them in a separate post.
And in case you were wondering: Chispa isn’t staying – but since she’s still with me at 8 weeks old, of course we’ll have fun while she’s here! She’ll move to Jilantzingo on Tuesday.
