Chaiary: dog/dog social fun!

I used to believe it was far more important for dogs to play with appropriate adult dogs than with dogs their own age (this is unsupported “common knowledge” floating around the R+ world). The just-so story is convincing enough: your dog is only going to be a puppy or juvenile animal for a fraction of their life; the conspecific interactions they will eventually have – if any – are mostly going to be with adult dogs. Plus what could a puppy possibly learn from other puppies? Adult dogs are the ones to look for in terms of socializing because adult dogs – other than puppies – actually have social skills.

Then I took Kristina Spaulding‘s excellent ethology class and learned that we do indeed know from actual studies (which I currently don’t have the bandwidth to dig out) that animals benefit from the opportunity to play with conspecifics of a similar age. This has changed my approach: I will now seek out more play opportunities for the puppies and juvenile dogs in my care – specifically with other young dogs.

Mexico and other places in Latin America I’ve been to have one big advantage when it comes to socialization: there’s ALWAYS dogs around. If you give your dog the chance to play every day, they’ll satiate (unless they are the rare dog who doesn’t satiate – these dogs do exist, just like there are dogs who never stop feeling hungry, but they are not the norm.) Given the opportunity to regularly satiate their social needs, they will be far easier to train, walk and work around other dogs. Win-win!

Below is a small selection of Chai’s play dates. These are just a few times I videoed over the course of the months and some I set to music (because it gives me joy) – but they are by far not the only ones. Chai has met other dogs of different ages every single day since she’s been with me. Some have become her friends; some stayed one-off play mates. You’ve seen some of these videos in Chai’s diaries already. In any case – here’s a chronological compilation with some context for each of them.

May 17, 2023 (day 41 with me): Chai plays with a new puppy

Chai played with (mejor dicho ignored in order to keep an eye on Game’s tennis ball) 5-months old puppy Archie at Chapultepec today!

May 28, 2023 (day 52): another new puppy playmate!

Chai made a new play-friend at Las Islas (UNAM), puppy Nenet! Enjoy the music and the play!

June 6, 2023 (day 61): playing with a new adult dog and practicing “pup-pup-pup” and whistle recalls … some of which are more successful than others!

Watch the video above to see my recalls – successful as well as unsuccessful! You won’t hear me use my formal recall cue in this video (“Schnee”). l’ll only use the formal cue in real life – outside of games and set-ups – when I am certain that Chai will respond. The informal recall and even my whistle recall? I don’t mind trying it sometimes and seeing it not work. These are data points that let me know where we are and what Chai’s ability to pay attention currently looks like.

After watching the video above with subtitles and voiceovers – think about the following questions and, if you’d like, leave your answers to any or all questions in the comments! I’ll be sure to read and respond to them!

  1. Can you tell why I chose the first two recall moments (these recalls are not successful – but why did I try them at the points in time that I did?)
  2. In one of the first two, can you spot an indication that Chai heard me even though she doesn’t come back?
  3. Why do you believe I used pup-pup-pup rather than whistled in recalls #2 and #3?
  4. Can you pinpoint (time-stamp) some of my favorite moments of the interaction between Chai and the other dog, Luna? What makes them stand out?

June 8, 2023: Chai (BC, 5.5 months) and Kiba (BC, 6.5 months)

We met our friends Alan and Kiba at the park and our girls had a blast playing together!

June 17, 2023 (day 72): adventures with Kiba at Chapultepec (and a sad, but beautiful song)

July 15, 2023 (day 100) – Chai and Kiba

Chai and I spent an hour with Alan and Kiba at the park today. As always, I started off with an informal recall away from Kiba (this is still HARD for Chai!) and then reinforced by releasing her to play. They also played with Kiba’s toy together!

Play-fighting and running together!

Good friends can share toys!

July 18, 2023: letting off steam after distraction recalls!

Today, we practiced really difficult distraction recalls! Chai needed to let off some steam after – and dog/dog play is perfect for this!

July 22, 2023 – all the Border Collies!

After shaping recalls away from Kiba, Chai got to hang out with her buddy and 4 other BC friends: Ivan’s dogs who were at the park with their dog sitters. Nicole, the child of the main dog sitter, tossed Kiba’s squeaky ball for Chai. I don’t mind informal toy play like this as long as it’s not with our formal training toys. It’s good for Chai to build a relationship with Nicole through playing! The last time, she got intimidated by Nicole who can be a little rough and wants to touch dogs from above or hug them (I suspect they’re between 8 and 12 years old, but I might be totally off – I’m bad at gauging the age of kids.)

August 8, 2023: new friends for Chai

My friend and colleague Kayla visited for a few days with her Border Collies Barley and Niffler and cat Norbert! This video is from the first evening Chai met all the new animals. (If you listened to our podcast chat, you may have already seen a shorter version of this video with a different song.) I like the fact that I’ve been able to introduce Chai to new dogs both in “her” apartment and in neutral spaces. She has also visited Nazli at Scarlett’s place and been to the apartment of friends who have cats.

August 20, 2023: fast friends!

Chai and Kala at Chapultepec! Kala is Zai and Kristen’s adult dog; this was the first time our dogs met!

September 10, 2023: Chai, Kala and Luca at Los Dinamos

We took a weekend trip to los Dinamos today! Time to not hear traffic noises and feel all naturey – even though this is still part of Mexico City! Luca, Zai and Kristen’s pug puppy, got to come as well!

October 15, 2023: Chai, Kiba and Elios

Today, Alan and Kiba introduced us to their friends Soto and Elios, Soto’s 11 months old Corgi!

October 22, 2023: Salazar with Daniel and Dina

Dina has become one of Chai’s best friends. Game and Dina are more acquaintances than friends, but they get along well enough. Today, Daniel (Dina’s human) and Dina showed us a hiking route outside Salazar. Game is wearing a muzzle because she’ll go into heat soon and tends to get easily over-aroused by other dogs running in the weeks before – it’s just a safety measure around Dina.

My bestest girl on the mountain. Mexico City in the distance to the left.

Snuggly girls on the car ride home. They were taking off each other’s burrs! (Poor Dina has a shaved paw because she needed to stay at the vet’s and get fluids for a nasty stomach infection the other week.)


At around 10 months – close to the time Chai went into heat the first time – she got significantly more socially selective. She still has her friends, but is less likely to initiate play with a new dog. She mostly just confidently ignores other dogs (or steals their balls). If given a choice, she’d rather work with me than play with other dogs.

This is a lovely development for a working breed. I see it in the other dogs her age as well: the young Dobi and a young Mal we used to run into at the park don’t play as much as they used to either, and Kiba and Chai, while still extremely close, treat each other more like family: “hey there, great to see you; I can basically read your mind just looking at you because we are the same; now let’s go do other stuff!” Their behavior is very similar; they grew up like siblings with Kiba being one month older. They even went into heat the same week. But there’s less playing from both of them: they seem to feel like grown up Border Collies around each other now. They will do stuff together, like sniff the same spots, greet the same dogs, lie down next to each other … But they rarely behave like puppies with each other (except for an exuberant greeting when they haven’t seen each other for longer than usual).

Dina, on the other hand, is still a favorite play mate of Chai’s. Dina’s play style is different – she’s a different type of dog. She’s built like a whippet and as fast as one, but wire-haired, incredibly gentle and giant-eared. I’m fond of her – and so is Chai. Dina is 3, but still loves to play chase games. If I were to anthropomorphize, I’d say that Chai looks up to Dina and thinks she’s “cool” – hence the continued playing! It’s unlikely that dogs find each other “cool,” but the thought makes me smile.

I suspect that over time, Chai will play a little less with Dina as well. They will stay close friends, but over the next few months, Chai’s behavior around Dina will probably start resembling her behavior around Kiba unless we are on a hike together (which doesn’t happen every day and tends to give the city dogs a boost of youth and bounciness!)

Chai and Kala would probably also keep playing a little longer into the future – or even on a permanent basis. They are extremely well-matched playmates. Kristen, Zai, Kala, Luca and their cats have moved abroad though. Chai says everyone, but especially Kala is always welcome on her couch if they ever miss Mexico City! (Chai is optimistic. I am realistic and would like to add: the cats would probably be safer staying elsewhere because of a certain Belgian Shepherd who lives on Chai’s couch as well and, while getting very good at not eating cats, can’t help the fact that they smell awfully tasty.)

Chai and Game, of course, will still play-wrestle as well. That’s typical for dogs sharing a house: anytime one of them needs to burn off energy, there’s a play partner right there! We just spent a few days at the beach and in this new environment, there was a lot of racing along the waves and chasing each other, too. I wish I had video!

Chaiary: the Kiba recall challenge!

Chai has a good recall away from dogs, even out of full-on play. Only Kiba is different: Kiba is Chai’s best friend. She is only a month older and they have the same play style.

Chai is able to recall … But only once they have played and Chai has satiated on Kiba. When she first sees her and hasn’t yet had an opportunity to play, she cannot currently respond when I call.

I love a good challenge, so I’m going to work up to recalls away from Kiba before Chai has had a chance to say hi!

June 12, 2023

Here, I’m trying an informal recall on leash: I will use the leash to stop Chai if she doesn’t respond. I will wait her out if she doesn’t respond and then “okay” release and drop the leash. Only once I get her to recall on “Pup-pup-pup” alone do I want to try and use her formal recall cue. That’s the plan for now anyways!

There were a two or three more recalls between June 12 and July 22 that I didn’t record and didn’t take notes on … And sadly, all I remember is that I did not get Chai to respond on Pup-pup-pup on the pink long line. Picking back up with a video on July 22:

July 22, 2023

Today, I decided to try a shaping approach: I would simply wait Chai out, release with “Okay!” and drop the leash as soon as she reoriented, weight-shifted or moved an ear back towards me. Well – I did, and Chai said, “Now what?”

Next time, I’ll either run up to Kiba together with Chai or call her when she checks in rather than releasing her right away: check in – recall – tongue click – chicken – “Okay!”

I don’t want to introduce that “Now what?” confusion into our recall!

Is one of the above options better or worse than the other one? No, they are simply different. Go with your gut if working on a similar challenge with your own dog!

July 24, 2023

I botched today’s training plan even though I went over it in my head before getting to the park: Alan and Kiba were late, so Chai and I worked on positions and personal play first. When our friends suddenly came around around the corner, I barely had time to hit record on my phone … And I ended up repeating yesterday’s session rather than doing what I actually wanted to do, which was call Chai when she reoriented. Anyways, here’s the video! Looking a bit better than yesterday, so we’ll take it as a win either way! And next time, I will call her!

My challenge: I only get a single recall to practice this because once the two Border Collies have had a chance to greet each other, I can call Chai without problems. The challenge is before they’ve said hi to each other! We’ll try again Wednesday.

July 26, 2023

I stuck to the training plan today, called “Schnee” as soon as Chai reoriented, got THE most enthusiastic response and ran back to Kiba together with her. I had planned on using my informal recall cue but the formal one came out of my mouth instead. It worked though – so all good!

Finally, things went (almost) according to plan … and I did not record it. Sad face. I’ll repeat the same step another time to get a video.

Today’s single salvageable picture of a great session isn’t very helpful!

August 3, 2023

Off leash Kiba and off leash Chai met at the park today. We hadn’t planned for it, but I felt optimistic, had chicken ready because we had just practice a food distraction recall, and just went with it! I used my formal recall cue (“Schnee!”) since it had worked so well the last time and Chai spun right around from running up to greet her friend, came back for her handful of chicken and then enjoyed a good play session. WE DID IT! I’ll repeat the exercise to get video proof. But oh-SO-proud of my girl!

Some pics from after the recall and after they played – by now, I had had time to get out my phone! Happy pups!

August 23, 2023 (the date in the video thumbnail is wrong)

FINALLY, I got my formal recall away from Kiba on video! Chai saw Kiba – checked in with me – looked at Kiba again – recalled on “Schnee” and got a piece of liver before being “okay”-released to play with her friend! SO proud of my puppy! (And SO grateful for these two friends – this human and his dog – and the fact that I can count on them unconditionally and for much more than just training dogs. Thank you, Alan.)

September 8, 2023: using the opportunity for another formal off-leash recall before saying hi to Kiba

I used today’s play-and-training-and-catching-up meet up for another recall away from Kiba before the dogs had a chance to say hi. I reinforced with liver and okay-released Chai to play.

You’ll see in this clip that recalling away from Kiba has become easy for Chai: as she’s growing up, she’s getting less playful which makes Kiba less of a difficult distraction than she used to be. Good girl, Chai. Sooner or later, I’ll have to stop calling you a puppy!

This video concludes the Kiba recall series! Recalling away from her bestie has turned into a walk in the – literal – park for Chai!